Today’s is Presidents’ Day, otherwise known as the day that half the people in America resent the other half because they don’t have to work. It’s also the weekend when the car selling season begins. Auto dealers are expected to sell around $4.6 million in automobiles this weekend, which sounds like a huge number, but it’s probably only 20 percent of what auto manufacturers spent for Super Bowl ads this year alone.
It’s also a great weekend to get screwed by a car salesman. As someone who has held the number two and three positions on the most hated professions list (lawyer, critic),
I trust that I’m safe in saying this: Car salesman are the worst people in the world. They are the scourge. They have an uncanny ability to make you leave a car lot feeling good about yourself, only to realize before you even make it into your driveway just how badly you got screwed. And even though there are buyer’s remorse clauses in most car sales, you have too much pride to go groveling back to that slimy schmuck and concede that you got had.
So, to make you feel a little better about yourself, I present you with the 5 Least Slick Car Salesmen.
Robert DeNiro as Paul Vitti in Analyze This
Eugene Levy as Ed in National Lampoon’s Vacation
William H. Macy as Jerry Lundegaard in Fargo
Larry David as Larry David in “Curb Your Enthusiasm”
Bill Paxton as Simon in True Lies
Finally, if you must buy a used car today, as always, I recommend driving to Baltimore to buy one from the only honest used car dealer in the nation, Big Bill Hells Cars.