My Hair Turned White at Such a Crazy Scene: Five Things You May Not Have Heard About This Week

By Cindy Davis | Lists | March 25, 2012 |

By Cindy Davis | Lists | March 25, 2012 |

I find the Important Stuff so you don’t have to.

5. Reese Witherspoon and Tori Spelling Announced Their Pregnancies (third and fourth, respectively).

Something’s in that Hollywood water these days…or could the explosion of star pregnancies be related to all the movie sex (see next item)?

4. Vulture Got Three Actors to Talk Dirty About Sex Scenes. “Is it big enough, is it shaped well, is it all shrunk up?”

In a revealing (though not their true identities) Q & A session, Archie, Betty and Veronica discuss the ins and outs of movie sex.

3. AMC Continued Its Delusional Campaign for “The Killing,” Season 2.

Let me tell you something AMC: Nobody gives a fuck who killed Rosie Larson anymore. After the fiasco that was Season 1 of “The Killing,” you lost your audience. Though the show started off well with some solid performances by Joel Kinnaman, Mireille Enos, Michelle Forbes and Brent Sexton, it quickly became clear that many episodes were just killing time. The mystery was purposefully and unnecessarily dragged out with too many hours that darted off in this direction or that, in an attempt to misdirect or give just about every character the means and motive, but by the end no one cared anymore. We just wanted it to be over—and it should have been. But some fool(s) decided, “Hey, let’s see if we can milk this thing another whole season” and some other fool(s) said, “Yeah, that’s a great idea,” and there we all sat with our mouths open, going “WTF?” Inexplicably surprised at the backlash, AMC and show producers tried to defend their decision and still think people will return to the show, even though they will not reveal the killer until the end of Season 2. Good luck with that. (Fools.)

2. Adam Levine Is Joining “American Horror Story,” Leonard Nimoy Will Guest on “The Big Bang Theory,” There’s a New and Improved, Younger Carrie Bradshaw and FX is Trying to Turn Fargo into Episodic Television.

Maroon 5 frontman and “The Voice” judge, Adam Levine is reportedly in final negotiations to appear on FX’s “American Horror Story” as half of a couple called “The Lovers.” It’s strange news indeed, but if he’s paired with Zachary Quinto, it might just work. Meanwhile, Leonard Nimoy is doing a guest stint (in voice only) on CBS’ “The Big Bang Theory” and the CW released the first photos of AnnaSophia Robb as the young Carrie Bradshaw in “The Carrie Diaries.”

Meanwhile, FX is in preliminary discussions about turning the Coen Brothers’ Fargo into a television series. I’m thinking Kristen Bell would be perfect as an updated Marge Gunderson.

1. Eddie Izzard Has Signed on to Play Grandpa Munster in NBC’s “Mockingbird Lane.”

In a very wise move by someone at NBC, this oddly perfect casting could be just the thing to draw in viewers. Along with others, I’ve been in mourning ever since “The Riches” was cancelled and I had zero interest in “The Munsters” remake…until now. Izzard is absolute perfection at playing any odd duck and there are even some similar physical affectations between Al Lewis and Eddie, whose version of Grandpa will be a shape-shifting womanizer. Bryan Fuller (“Dead Like Me, Pushing Daisies”) wrote the pilot episode, which will be directed by Bryan Singer (X-Men, The Usual Suspects, Superman Returns, “House, Dirty Sexy Money”).

Now we just need to see where they go with the rest of the cast (Minnie Driver for Lily, anyone?).

Also, we need Grandpa’s voting machine.

Cindy Davis thinks Professor Plum killed Rosie with a lead pipe in the cellar.