Happy Hanukkah, my dears. I got you some presents! Two for each night, to be precise. Yes, some of them are already partially unwrapped. I apologize. I got excited. I’m sure you can take care of the rest. And, no, I won’t tell you what they are, I don’t want to ruin the supri-OH FINE. It’s candy. I got you 16 pieces of eye candy. And they’re a whole lot better than gelt, I can assure you. Here are Hollywood’s Hottest Jews ranging from full, to half, to quarter, to “ate a latke once.” Please don’t waste our time quibbling over someone’s Jewishness. It ain’t the season for that. Instead, I urge you to enjoy your gifts and then go dance the hora. If you know what I mean.