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Five "SNL" Skits That'd Have Been Better Ideas for a Movie Than MacGruber

By Dustin Rowles | Lists | May 20, 2010 |

By Dustin Rowles | Lists | May 20, 2010 |

MacGruber comes out tomorrow, and of all the “SNL” skits, it would seem the least likely candidate for the big-screen treatment. That said, and as Dan’s review can attest, it’s a much funnier movie than you’d expect from the premise. It’s certainly the best “SNL” movie since Wayne’s World, though it suffers from what plagues most “SNL” films: It feels like “an overlong short.” But, as Dan writes, “The film is frequently funny but ultimately insubstantial, offering laughs that last no longer than the sketches that spawned it.”

But, I figure, if you can make a movie out of what is essentially a 90-second skit where th lead character dies at the end of each, then surely you can turn several of the other insubstantial skits into full-length movies. So, here is my proposal for five more “SNL” movies based on some of our favorite skits.

5. Trebek vs. Connery: A buddy comedy about the relationship between Alex Trebek (as played by Will Ferrell) and Sean Connery (as played Darrell Hammond), who decide to become roommates after Trebek is replaced with a younger host on “Jeopardy.” Norm McDonald stars as Burt Reynolds and Zack Galifianakis will play himself. THE HANGOVER meets THE ODD COUPLE.

4. Down by the River: John Goodman takes the role originated by Chris Farley in this dark comedy about a inspirational speaker, Matt Foley, who lives in a van down by the river. Complications ensue when Foley is awarded a massive book deal and has to decide whether to give up his lifestyle or continue to live in a van down by the river. Meryl Streep for the love interest. In the tone of UP IN THE AIR.

3. Omeletteville — A boisterous musical comedy in the vein of DODGEBALL about the competitive world of food mascots, starring Justin Timberlake as the Omeletteville mascot, John C. Reilly as a giant singing hot dog, Isla Fisher as the villainous clam, and Zooey Deschanel as the … ummm … taco. Judi Dench will make a cameo appearance as a competition judge dressed as a Pig for a Gourmet Rib restaurant.


2. Massive Head Wound Harry — A dark drama along the lines of MIDNIGHT COWBOY, about two prostitutes trying to make it in New York City. One is crippled by a massive head hound, which he works into his hooking routine. Starring Tom Hanks as Massive Head Wound Harry, Damon Wayans as the other male prostitute, and Mickey Rourke as their pimp. A Ridley Scott film.

1. Natalie Raps — In the spirit of BEING JOHN MALKOVICH, Natalie Raps follows Natalie Portman for a single 24-hour period as she drinks, fights, fucks all night, snorts, smokes, smacks the shit out of Jeff Zucker, kills a dog for fun, drives while intoxicated, takes a shit on a man’s face, and slits another man’s throat and pours nitrous down it so she can watch him cry and laugh as he dies. Zack Snyder will direct.

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.

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