Baby We Were Born To Run: Top Ten Favorite Couples On The Lam
This weekend In Time Justin Timberlake’s second entry into his 2011 “I’m An Actor Now Guys, Okay?” campaign debuts. The film is a futuristic, high concept On The Lam movie wherein J. Tim. gets to play Robin Hood…with time. Check out the preview.
Against my better judgment, I’m excited. Like, it looks like it might be utter sh*t, but I’m still excited. From Cillian Murphy’s vaguely ridiculous leather jacket to the bitchy sneer on Vincent Kartheiser’s face, there are about eleventy billion reasons why this movie might be amazing. Above all, I love me a Road Movie. No matter what the genre, a Road Movie will drive the plot, frame the narrative and push your main characters together in the most delightfully uncomfortable way. Works for screwball comedy (It Happened One Night) and thrillers (The Fugitive) alike. But the best kind of Road Movie is the kind with a generous helping of sexual tension. Let your photogenic leads run around together until they get all sweaty and tattered and…yes. That. (Bonus points if there are chains.)
Matt Damon and Franke Potente in The Bourne Identity: As much as I love Damon, the Bourne movies were never as much fun when he was on his own. It’s all about cramped Mini Coopers and steamy dye jobs.
Christian Slater and Patricia Arquette in True Romance: Already in love when they go on the run, Alabama and Clarence grow even closer while being chased down. Nothing says true romance like love in
an elevator a phone booth.
Sissy Spacek and Martin Sheen in Badlands: One disturbing little slice of cinema, this film belongs in the Kalifornia and Natural Born Killers camp. Beautiful But Deadly.
Goldie Hawn and Mel Gibson in Bird On A Wire: I believe I’m supposed to retroactively hate anything that Mel Gibson has ever done, but I can’t turn my back on this classic from my childhood. I must have watched it dozens of times. Although, now that I think about it, there’s a fairly offensive scene of Gibson playing “gay.” Dammit, Mel, you ruin everything.
Tony Curtis and Sidney Poitier in The Defiant Ones: Oh ho ho, you thought this movie was just about breaking down racial barriers? I think not. Curtis leaves Sexy Trampy Single Mom to chase down Poitier and almost certain death. Why? Because he’s Sidney Poitier, that’s why.
Rutger Hauer and Mimi Rogers in Wedlock: This 90’s remake/retelling of The Defiant Ones was another favorite from my youth. If you haven’t seen it, you’ve missed Rutger Hauer wearing one of the all time greatest costumes. Ever. Folks, he gets laid in that costume. That’s what it’s like on the road.
Nicolas Cage and Laura Dern in Wild At Heart: How could I not give some love to Nicolas Cage in a prosthetic nose and a snakeskin jacket singing Elvis? I have to. This is one of Lynch’s weirder films. And that’s saying a lot.
Susan Sarandon and Geena Davis in Thelma and Louise: People go back and forth on the nature of the relationship between Thelma and Louise in this film. For the most part I think hinting at sexual tension or lesbianism undercuts the strong feminist message and the loving depiction of true female friendship. That being said, with apologies to Michael Madsen, things would have gone a whole lot smoother for these ladies without the menfolk.
Tom Cruise and Samantha Morton in Minority Report: Oh, no, of course they’re not an actual couple. What with her being a slack-jawed, rag doll of a precog who had spent her entire life up to this point in a wading pool…with her brothers. So, you know, emotional baggage. That being said, Morton’s stellar (ain’t she always) performance is what makes this movie as good as it is. (If you have any doubt, then try watching Tom Cruise hit the road with Cameron Diaz is the head-spinningly terrible Knight and Day.) There’s something sweet about the way Cruise drags her limp body around with him.
Robert Donat and Madeleine Carroll in The 39 Steps: This is the classic I hate you/I’m handcuffed to you/I love you story. Fugitive boy meets girl and “accidentally” feels her up while she’s forcibly bound to him. I love this Hitchcock film for its somewhat jarring mixture of espionage and screwball comedy.
George Clooney, Tim Bake Nelson and John Turturro in O Brother Where Art Thou?: These boys may not be in love, but they know how to be on the lam. Bonus points for eating gopher, being loved up and turned into horny toads, and R-U-N-N O-F-T-ing together.