Shia LaBeouf demonstrates a serious and ultimately chronic case of verbal diarrhea nearly every time he sits for an interview.. Sometimes the things he says are actually amusing, but a lot of the crap that comes out of his mouth is so rude and disrespectful that — let’s face it — if a woman said the same stuff, her Hollywood career would be over in a matter of moments (see Megan Fox). Also, it’s not as if his level of talent (despite his “method” ways) is so high that it should mitigate some of the damage he wreaks with his cocky remarks, and the manner in which Shia has fed off the studio system in several franchises is almost laughable considering his attitude at present. As far as his acting ego is concerned, the guy is steps away from Samuel L. Jackson-esque steepled fingers while talking about “the craft,” only Shia isn’t cool enough to get away with that sort of thing.
Oh, and I’d like to remind Shia that Sean Penn’s character in Dead Man Walking was executed by means of lethal injection — not the electric chair. Here are the eleven most ill-advised quotes to fall out of Shia’s mouth.
On dropping acid to be method for The Necessary Death of Charlie Countryman: “There’s a way to do an acid trip like Harold & Kumar, and there’s a way to be on acid. What I know of acting, Sean Penn actually strapped up to that (electric) chair in Dead Man Walking. These are the guys that I look up to.” - USA Today
On Tom Cruise: “When Tom Cruise walks outside his house, he doesn’t pick his nose. From the minute he leaves his door to the minute he comes back home, he doesn’t pick his nose. Now that’s a certain way to live your life that I have no ambitions toward.” - Hero Complex
On his mom: “Probably the sexiest woman I know is my mother. She’s an ethereal angel. Nobody looks like that woman. If I could meet my mother and marry her, I would. I would be with my mother now, if she weren’t my mother, as sick as that sounds.” - NY Daily News
On the Transformers franchise: “There are a lot of people that liked the second one, but I hated it. I just didn’t enjoy it. I thought we missed the mark. I got confused, I couldn’t see what the fuck was going on, you know with certain robots… I couldn’t decipher what was happening. There were storyline paths that I just wouldn’t have gone down.” - FHM
On the Megan Fox problem: “Megan developed this Spice Girl strength, this woman-empowerment [stuff] that made her feel awkward about her involvement with Michael [Bay], who some people think is a very lascivious filmmaker, the way he films women. Mike films women in a way that appeals to a 16-year-old sexuality. It’s summer. It’s Michael’s style.” - Hero Complex
On Steven Spielberg: “I love Steven. I have a relationship with Steven that supersedes our business work. And believe me, I talk to him often enough to know that I’m not out of line. And I would never disrespect the man. I think he’s a genius, and he’s given me my whole life. He’s done so much great work that there’s no need for him to feel vulnerable about one film. But when you drop the ball you drop the ball.” - Popeater
On all the money he made from blockbusters: “If I could give the money back and get all the credibility in the world that I’m seeking, I would do it tomorrow. In a heartbeat.” - USA Today
On Michael Bay “When I met Mike, I was a seventeen-year-old boy. He was my fucking god. Mike is a vulnerable guy.” - GQ
On the studio system vs indies: “These dudes are a miracle. They give you the money, and they trust you — [unlike the studios, which] give you the money, then get on a plane and come to the set and stick a finger up your ass and chase you around for five months.” — Hollywood Reporter
On doing real sex in Nymphomaniac: “[The movie] is what you think it is. It is Lars Von Trier, making a movie about what he’s making. For instance, there’s a disclaimer at the top of the script that basically says we’re doing it for real. Everything that is illegal, we’ll shoot in blurred images. Other than that, everything is happening.” - Hollywood Reporter “I sent [Von Trier] videotapes of me and my girlfriend having sex and that’s how I got the job.” - Entertainmentwise
On Justin Bieber: “He’s got this presence like Buddha. He’s like the young prince. Bieber is bomb. He’s like a 16-year-old Frank Sinatra.” — “Jimmy Kimmel Live”
Agent Bedhead lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She and her little black heart can be found at Celebitchy.