Anti-masking is such a funny and annoying conspiracy. The whole set of conspiracies around Covid is infuriating as hell. You have all these right-wing nutjobs screaming about government overreach and control and the perils of the surveillance state and… They should just get their own stuff! Stop stealing our left-wing nutjob rhetoric! That’s our terrain. Back off. You don’t see us marching to protest ‘uncontrolled immigration’ or ‘welfare scroungers’ or whatever other nourishing gibberish gets you going in the morning, so back off and leave ‘government overreach’ and ‘the perils of the surveillance’ to us!
Besides, we don’t remember you marching when Bush signed the Patriot Act, or when all that stuff about extraordinary rendition came out, or when Obama drone bombed innocents abroad, or when Amazon partnered up with the Department of Defense. Where were you guys then? You know, when actual examples of the sh*t you pretend to care about were happening? Because we were on the streets. And we sure as sh*t didn’t see you lot out there. What’s that? Yeah, we’re sure! Trust us. You’re not easy to miss. So to see you out there now, we can’t help but think: Either you’re all being—to say the least—a tiny little bit disingenuous and maybe you have another agenda, or you genuinely think that now, in the year 2020 when people carry a smartphone in their pocket at all times and trust Google and Apple with every intimate detail of their lives and huge swathes of our economy are based around these ‘platform capitalism’ giants using that information to predict our behaviours and sell little quantised bits of our very essence, now is the point when we are starting to be monitored and controlled all because someone asked us to wear a little fu**ing mask during a global pandemic. And if you think that, then, well, I guess any new convert to the cause is welcome. But, Jesus, lads, try and keep up. Still, though, welcome to the other side. There’s no going back now. We are a nice club overall. We only have one rule: Wear a fu**ing mask.
Anywho, on that note, here’s a fun AskReddit threat that asks the question: ‘Which fictional character would definitely be an anti-masker?’ You can check out the full thread here, but below are some highlights:
Header Image Source: Sony Pictures Television