I don’t really eat sweets, and I especially have zero idea about American candy, the name of nigh on every single one sounding like complete gibberish to me, so the topic of today’s AskReddit thread is all a bit alien to me.

Fun fact! London’s (and I’m sure other UK towns’) ravaged late capitalist high streets are now overrun by slight variations on an otherwise indistinguishable series of ‘American Candy Store’ or ‘American Sweet Shop’. Historic shopping centre, Oxford Street, once home to iconic retailers like HMV, recently had something like thirty of these garish eyesores dotted up and down it—that is until long-standing rumours about them serving as money laundering fronts, ploys to dodge business rates, and/or more, came to a head, and led to a number of news articles and investigations that resulted in a bunch of them being shut down.

Seeing those ugly pieces of sh*t pop up like a parasitic fungus over the high streets has been my main exposure to American candy, so like I say: This topic is largely abstract to me, but nevertheless, it’s always a trip to read all those wacky names as Reddit asks the question: ‘What is the worst candy?’ You can check out the full thread here, but below are some highlights: