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Even the Darkest Timeline is Looking at Our Timeline and Saying, 'What the F**k?'

By Dustin Rowles | Politics | January 15, 2019 |

By Dustin Rowles | Politics | January 15, 2019 |


Look: I’m gonna give you some Twitter reactions to Trump’s fast-food garbageganza in the White House last night, but I’m going to make you eat your veggies first. To wit:

— Iowa Rep. Steve King has finally been disciplined (is that the right word?) for his white supremacy comments, as the Republican leadership in the House has removed King from the Judiciary and Agriculture Committees. Being stripped of those committee assignments does not change Rep. King’s beliefs, nor does it change the fact that his Iowa constituency elected him to that position despite knowing about those beliefs, but it does at least give the illusion that Republicans are doing something, as Democrats take further steps to publicly reprimand King. And not for nothing, but Mitch McConnell also suggested that King should “find another line of work,” and Mitt Romney said he should “quit,” although King’s beliefs are not necessarily distinct from the President’s beliefs.

It’s something. I guess.

— Meanwhile, The Times is also reporting that Trump’s inauguration cost twice as much as Obama’s (and we all know there weren’t nearly as many people in attendance at Trump’s inauguration).

There was $10,000 for makeup for 20 aides at an evening inaugural event. There was another $30,000 in per diem payments to dozens of contract staff members, in addition to their fully covered hotel rooms, room service orders, plane tickets and taxi rides, including some to drop off laundry.

The bill from the Trump International Hotel was more than $1.5 million. And there was a documentary, overseen by a close friend of Melania Trump’s, that was ultimately abandoned.

This tracks with a lot of reporting that suggested that Trump used his own Inauguration to essentially launder money to enrich himself and friends. Meanwhile, The Daily Beast is reporting that Mueller is scrutinizing a breakfast meeting between Michael Flynn, Devin Nunes, and a bunch of foreign officials two days before the inauguration. Mueller is looking into it as part of an effort to discover whether foreign officials donated to the inaugural committee to buy influence from Trump.

In another Times scoop, there is some talk in the White House of pulling the United States from NATO completely.

Senior administration officials told The New York Times that several times over the course of 2018, Mr. Trump privately said he wanted to withdraw from the North Atlantic Treaty Organization. Current and former officials who support the alliance said they feared Mr. Trump could return to his threat as allied military spending continued to lag behind the goals the president had set.

In the days around a tumultuous NATO summit meeting last summer, they said, Mr. Trump told his top national security officials that he did not see the point of the military alliance, which he presented as a drain on the United States.

You know who would benefit most if the United States pulled out of NATO? Russia. You know who would be giddy as hell? Vladimir Putin, with whom Trump has made efforts to keep details of their meetings secret.

OK! Did I miss anything? No? Great. Here we go:

“hamberders.” How does autocorrect even let him get away with these mistakes? You know what? I bet he turned off autocorrect (can you do that?) He was like, “Don’t tell me how to spell, you fone. I’m the Parsident of the United States. I’m an expert in spelleng. Nobody spellz better than me! When Merriam-Oxford wants to know how to spell a werd, they consult me!”

I think TK put it best, however: “Motherfucker owns multiple hotels. He couldn’t get a damn chef to come in and cook these kids a real goddamn meal? He is a festering asshole stuffed with garbage.”

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.

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