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North Carolina Republicans Are a Bunch of Punk-Ass Bitches

By Dustin Rowles | Politics | December 15, 2016 |

By Dustin Rowles | Politics | December 15, 2016 |


It took shithead Pat McCrory a full month after the election to concede the Governor’s race in North Carolina to Roy Cooper, and he only did so after his voter suppression efforts failed, after whining about nonexistent voter fraud, and after trying to delegitimize the election to such an extent that the Republican-controlled state house would toss the election results and appoint McCrory.

It didn’t work, so now the state Congress — where Republicans hold a majority in both Houses — have decided since they can’t beat Democrat Roy Cooper, they’ll just strip him of his powers.

From the NYTimes:

After calling a surprise special session, Republican lawmakers who control the General Assembly introduced measures to end the governor’s control over election boards, to require State Senate approval of the new governor’s cabinet members and to strip his power to appoint University of North Carolina trustees.

Republicans also proposed to substantially cut the number of state employees who serve at the governor’s pleasure, giving Civil Service protections to hundreds of managers in state agencies who have executed the priorities of Gov. Pat McCrory, a Republican.

If the measures pass the legislature, where Republicans hold large majorities in both chambers, and Mr. McCrory signs off, they would significantly hamstring the new governor, Roy Cooper, who takes office in January.



The bill was introduced in a surprise special session, the fourth of the year, which came right after the third special session ended. Democrats had no idea it was coming.

The control over the election boards is the real kick in the ass here, because it means that Governor Cooper may not be able to roll back all those voter suppression efforts the Republicans have implemented.

But here’s the thing: North Carolina is trending blue. It’s close. It may get there by 2020 or 2024, and now that the Supreme Court has struck down racial gerrymandering in the state congressional districts, Democrats may start to gain a foothold.

So Democrats: When you have control of the state in a few years, remember this day. Remember what the Republicans did. Don’t fucking roll over this time. Let’s not raise money to pay for their firebombed headquarters. There was a time to be the better person. That time has passed. Now, it’s time to take your sweet fucking revenge on these whiny-ass, sore losin’ assholes. Make those old white fuckers pay.