A few weeks ago, Courtney spoke about the horrors of YouTube for Kids, and the misery that the Finger Family has wrought on homes with toddlers. It’s unconscionable; those videos are Eighth Amendment violations and their makers should be imprisoned. But they won’t be; the unboxing phenomenon is very, very lucrative (inexplicably).
Adjacent to the Finger Family and unboxing on YouTube Kids are toy reviews. People try out toys, make videos of them, and upload them on to YouTube, and it’s not only lucrative for the reviewers — who can rake in millions in YouTube ad revenue — but for the toy makers, whose products are being advertised for free.
That’s why some of the bigger YouTube toy review channels have been snatched up by the corporations. For instance, the DisneyCarToys channel — which has over 1.1 million subscribers — had no previous relationship with Disney (despite the name) until the Disney-owned Maker Studios brought those channels into their merchandise fold.
As a Maker Studio spokesman noted in announcing the purchase:
“Toy review channels have captured the imaginations of families around the world and become the authority on the hottest toys on the market, as well as one of the fastest-growing genres of family programming online.”
“Captured the imaginations of families?” More like, ruined the lives of parents
It got so over-the-top obnoxious in our home, that I actually deleted YouTube and YouTube Kids from all devices, although I still use YouTube on my laptop. And because my kids have watched Toy Product reviews, those videos are still being recommended to me whenever I check YouTube.
This one was my first recommendation this morning, while scrolling through Friday night’s late-night TV clips.
In case you don’t want to watch it, it’s a review of the Baby Alive doll — the doll that poops! — and the reviewers are testing it with chocolate pudding.
Here’s what that looks like:
That’s doll shit, y’all. Actual doll shit.
It’s bad enough that our toddlers are seeing this, but parents are seeing it, too. Won’t somebody please think of the parents?