Would You Cheat On The World's Most Beautiful Actress? No Way, Right? What If She Were Okay With It?
Happy Wednesday, my little squidlings. I feel a terrible sympathy for Wednesday this week because it lacks the mathematical vim of Monday, the stabby historical significance of Tuesday, the drunken viridity of Thursday and the thank gaudiness of Friday. It’s just plain old Wednesday. You know, one of those days. Let’s buy Wednesday a shirt. (Woot)
You know what always makes me feel better, darling Wednesday? Talking about dinosaurs. In this clip a comedian argues with his audience over which is the best dinosaur and, in the process, velocicaptures my heart. Seriously, he loathes Jurassic Park, and I don’t care. That’s how great he is. He uses some salty language (especially at the beginning) so be warned. But he also says “unfurl those entrails.” So, you know, it’s worth it. (The Mary Sue)
Speaking of unfurling entrails, please join me in an irate ovation (in any shade of your choosing) for the Angry Black Lady as she eviscerates a Kansas rep who suggested his constituents shoot illegal immigrants from helicopters. You know, to keep the numbers down. Come to ABL for the sharp political discourse, stay for the “Carry On My Wayward Son” reference. (Angry Black Lady)
In other, “Smart Babes Are Hot News,” the new Wired magazine is the first to feature a female engineer on the cover. Well, cool, that only took eighteen years. (Evil Mad Scientist)
In “Italian Babes Are Hotter Than Your Average Babe” news, the drop dead gorgeous actress Monica Bellucci said in an interview that she does not expect fidelity from her husband (Black Swan’s Vincent Cassel), only respect, loyalty and elegance. He truly is the luckiest bastard in the world, no? (Celebitchy)
Speaking of EILFs (Europeans with whom I Would Like to elegantly Fornicate), Film Drunk has a new trailer for the X-Men film featuring extra footage and some sizzling Bacon. The bad news? It’s in Russian. The great news? “FAAASSSBENDER” needs no translation. (Film Drunk)
Terry Pratchett’s fantastic Discworld books are being turned into a television series. Specifically, and somewhat oddly, a Police (Watch) Procedural. I really don’t know who they will cast as Commander Vimes now that Pete Postlethwaite has passed away. (Bleeding Cool)
Also hopefully resting in peace is rapper Nate Dogg who passed away last night after a long history of health issues. (Evil Beet)
Take a gander at this well-done compilation of opening film titles that was shown at SXSW this week. They win all the points for including a snippet of the jaw-droppingly gorgeous The Fall. (The Curious Brain)
Also shown at SXSW was this fantastic fake Mario Bros. trailer. We’ve discussed this, right? How if Mario is their last name, then it’s Mario Mario and Luigi Mario and that’s an unfortunate thing to have on your kart driver’s license.
And, finally, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost have made a career out of making me jealous of their friendship. Here they are gadding about in a desert dressed in costume and bickering about Star Wars. Seriously, I just want to share a flat with them.
Joanna Robinson has a whole list of EILFs. If you have nominations to add to the list, send them to [email protected] or follow her @quityourJRob. Also, comments were borked but now they’re not thanks to the mad genius of mswas.