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black-panther-butt.jpg

Whose Black Panther Butt Is in the ‘Wakanda Forever’ Trailer?

By Mike Redmond | Pajiba Love | July 24, 2022 |

By Mike Redmond | Pajiba Love | July 24, 2022 |

black-panther-butt.jpg

If you didn’t see the Black Panther: Wakanda Forever trailer when it absolutely dominated Comic-Con on Saturday night, maybe remedy that with the link back there. The whole thing surprisingly slaps and surprisingly exists given the impossible situation the sequel was put in when Chadwick Boseman died. Marvel and director Ryan Coogler have held strong on not recasting T’Challa, which obviously put some difficult constraints on the story. However, it seems like they pulled it off, and as predicted, the Black Panther mantle appears to have been passed down thanks to a heroic shot of a new Panther’s, um, well, butt. Naturally, social media is going wild trying to deduce the owner of them cakes. (Hi, hello. Bossip reader from the wayback.) Of course, everyone is wasting their time because I already figured it out.

As for how I know, I spent a decade blogging butts, people. That’s like asking how bats fly in the dark. It’s what they’re made for. Anyway, remember where you were this day because I’m never going to shut up if I’m right. You won’t hear the end of it.

Mostly unrelatable Kristin Cavallari spoke about life as a single mom following her decision to split from Jay Cutler. (Lainey Gossip)

There’s nothing I will love more than watching Ben Affleck absolutely hate his entire existence. Just… *chef kiss* (Dlisted)

Gwyneth Paltrow doesn’t miss acting if anyone cares. (Celebitchy)

Madison Cawthorn is broke and in serious financial trouble for screwing around with campaign funds he wasn’t supposed to touch. (Daily Beast)

In the midst of having a second baby with Grimes and impregnating a Neuralink executive with twins, Elon Musk apparently ruined Google co-founder Sergey Brin’s marriage by sleeping with his wife. (Yahoo)

Johnny Depp’s lawyers are already trying to torpedo Amber Heard’s appeal. (Deadline)

And just in case it wasn’t clear that this was the jerkwad portion of tonight’s column:

Leslye Headland’s Star Wars series locks down its lead actress. (Variety)

Kate McKinnon reveals why she left SNL. (EW)

Minecraft wisely says “hell no” to NFTs and blockchain. (Kotaku)

As happens on occasion, KWDragon signed up for Cannonball Read, has read the books, but life has gotten in the way of writing the reviews until now. A Song for the Void by Andrew C. Piazza nicely balances gory horror, psychological horror, and historic detail. "Piazza fills his work with rich descriptions that put the tang of the ocean in your nose…as you read the reminiscences of Doctor Pearce and his recent misadventures on the HMS Charger." What would you do with your time if life didn’t get in the way? (Cannonball Read 14)