Hello, gentle readers. It’s your friendly neighborhood TK, here to delight you with a lovely assortment of links and goodies, in the hopes of brightening your day. It’s opportunities like this that truly bring me joy, and I hope it brings you some too. Also, the truth is that your mother found you in a shoebox behind a whorehouse. I’m sorry you had to find out this way.
On to the links, you cretins.
Are you a Star Wars junkie? Do you have a penchant for typography and nifty decor? Then these Star Wars typography prints will look lovely in that crap hole you call a home. (Nerd Approved)
Sticking with Star Wars, the internet was in a tizzy over the weekend because the White House actually responded to this petition to build a functional Death Star. It was pretty awesome, but at the same time, I’m a little disappointed. If we’re not building gigantic moon-sized space stations with planet-destroying laser beams, what the hell are we spending our defense budget on? (Uproxx)
I’ve never been a fan of the Metal Gear video game series, but this concept art for the next entry is simply amazing. Also, a little nuts. (Unreality)
Someone over on Facebook this weekend was lamenting how bad Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D was. I had predicted that “it’s probably better than watching people poop on each other. Probably.” Which is my uncomfortable segue into directing you to this chainsaw-themed comic over at the fantastically twisted Cyanide and Happiness.
Speaking of chainsaw massacres — I know this has been around for a while, but how did I never notice it before?
There isn’t any one specific page here to direct you to, because the entire site is absolutely stunning. Amazing photography and images from all around Africa. (The Africa They Never Show You)
Also stunning? Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, who killed last night at the Golden Globes. This article, on the history of their friendship, is charming and funny and fascinating and makes me love them even more. Money quote: “I remember Tina Fey wrote a play about Catherine the Great fucking a horse and I thought, ‘That lady is hot stuff, I wanna know her.” (Vulture)
In other awards-related items, The Film Experience has chronicled the 100 oldest living Oscar recipients. Bonus points for Emmanuelle Riva, whose birthday is on the day of the Academy Awards show this year. (The Film Experience)
Fassbender is single again. Ladies, moisten your lions. Dudes too, actually. (Celebitchy)
Tony Moore, co-creator of The Walking Dead (the comic) has a new series coming out called Fear Agent, described as “a booze-fueled space romp, in the aesthetic of EC’s seminal classics of the 1950s.” Aw, you had me at “booze-fueled.” The first issue is now available for free in digital formats. (Boing Boing)
The Escapist’s Ben Yahtzee rates his five best and five worst video games of 2012, in his usual brilliantly scathing fashion. Even non-gamers will love it. Go watch it. I SAID GO WATCH IT, JERKS. (Zero Punctuation)
Catzilla. Yes, I said Catzilla. Shut up and check it out. This three minutes of animation is better than the entire Roland Emmerich movie.
All too often, mashups are tired retreads. But then, someone mixes The Beatles with Massive Attack and, well, damn. (via Wax Audio)
TK does not love you, and he never will. You can email him here.