So, well, Justin Timberlake proposed to Jessica Biel. I’m doing that thing where I’m trying really hard to care. (Celebitchy)
And, because he’s a spotlight stealer with no sense of decency, our friend Paul Tassi over at Unreality announced his engagement today. Only he did his with Pokemon costumes. Natch. (Unreality)
I wish both these couples the best of luck and hope their wedding things never end up on this site for the bitter and lovelorn. (Never Liked It Anyway)
In case you were wondering which new show should fill the creepy, gimp-suited hole in your heart now “American Horror Story” is off the air, Dustin has 7 new and returning shows you should seek out and 7 you should avoid. Dustin will never, not once steer you wrong. (Warming Glow)
Okay, that “Most Important Faces” headline? That was in reference to this infographic on social media. Now, wait, hold up, before you discount this data and my fears about the idiocracy of America, bear in mind how many people (non-teenaged, non-mallrats people) use Facebook and Twitter. Then scratch your head along with me at these numbers. Beyonce and her pregnancy are by far the least troubling statistic on here. (Frugal Dad)
Speaking of mallrats, it turns out the sassmouth children who talk back are our future. In other news, I still miss “Veronica Mars.” (NPR)
Speaking of “Veronica Mars,” one of my favorite former cast members, Amanda Seyfried, has been offered the role of Cosette in the upcoming Tom Hooper “Les Miserables.” This news is fine. WHAT IS NOT FINE IS HIM OFFERING THE ROLE OF EPONINE TO TAYLOR SWIFT. I apologize, Universe, this is my fault, I said “Anyone but Lea Michelle” one too many times. Uggggccchhh. (Vulture)
And while we’re on the subject of music, the amazing Patti Smith has written a tribute to Amy Winehouse which will appear on her next album. I cannot wait. (Gothamist)
Um, let’s have an antidote to that depressing link, shall we? How about pictures of Jean-Ralphio and Tom Haverford partying? Okay, fine, mostly it’s just pictures of Aziz Ansari making faces. Ain’t nothing wrong with that. (Buzzfeed)
Ah, but this proposed Tim Tebow Marvel comic book? Yeah that’s all kinds of wrong. (With Leather)
Speaking of idiocracy, this is how I’m choosing to cover last night’s Iowa Caucus. Ron Paul’s bitchy tweets and Michele Bachmann’s concession speech. (Uproxx)
Finally, the pun-loving idiot in my brain can’t help but share this The Princess Bride pregnancy test. Inconceivable, indeed. (Nerd Approved)
Don’t tell TK, but I got him the Slingshot Zombiehammer, complete with Skull Ejector for Christmas. Something the whole family can enjoy.
Finally, an idiotic little game from one of my Facebook friends. Find which song was #1 in your birth country on the day you were born and post it here. (Americans can use Billboard.) Mine is worse than any of you could possibly imagine.