Do you ever have that moment when you realize you’ve watched too many movies? Cause after all, my little wonderwalls, there is such a thing as REAL life and the movie explanation often doesn’t apply. That being said, when I read about this mysterious “goo” plaguing some Alaskan villages, my first thought was “smear it on a toaster and play some Jackie Wilson!” (The Independent)
Though I take comfort in knowing I haven’t watched as many movies as this bloke who built an Alien/Predator themed motorcycle. Thanks, mswas! (Oddity Central)
While we’re on the subject of goo, reader Candee sent me these amazing artisinal jello shots. I want to eat them all. And then dance around to Jackie Wilson. (Yummly)
Because I’ve seen so many movies, these Pop Culture Cinegraphs really float my boat. That Tilda Swinton one sort of sunk me, though. Seriously, that is some scary sh*t. (Uproxx)
Speaking of sea worthy vessels, has thou considered the couch? Here some lads from the impishly (if not very creatively) named BroShenanigans have invented “couch surfing.” (Gamma Squad)
Speaking of imps, those scamps over at “Newsweek” have put together a rather inflammatory cover featuring Pajiba’s favorite crazyface, Michelle Bachman. H/T to Mrs. Julien. (Village Voice)
Speaking of inflammatory, what in the bloody hell went on this weekend in London? While the obvious answer is a riot, the reasoning is not ENTIRELY clear to me and Choire Sicha’s odd and weirdly flip coverage isn’t helping. Londoners? What’s the haps? And is that police officer really ticketing that car? (The Awl)
I reckon that police officer was just trying to do his job…actor Jason Momoa, on the other hand, wants to not only act on the Conan films, he wants a hand in writing them as well. You know, I quite like Momoa and despite his himbo looks, he comes off as quite intelligent and charming, so I’m not going to mock him for this. Anyway, it seems to me that he mostly just wants to work on the story CONCEPT, not the actual words. And, lastly, in case I forgot to mention it, he is a very good-looking feller. (/Film)
You know who else has been doing their job? Astronomers! They’ve maybe found three new eensy (scientific term, dontchaknow) planets that have been hiding behind Pluto. I would like these three and Pluto to all be classified as real planets so we can add new words to the mnemonic. My Very Excellent Mother Just Sent US Nine Pizzes All Covered with Cheese. Or something. I like lengthy mnemonics. (Space)
Speaking of outer space, Marvin The Martian even looks cute in skeletal form. The Powerpuff Girls are not so lucky. Seriously, they might even be scarier than Tilda. And that’s pretty scary. (Unreality)
And on this, a rather cantankerous Monday full of weirdly angry commenters (seriously, guys, Bill Simmons, that’s your rallying cry?), I give you this cheery bubbly pop song.
Finally, my loves, here’s a sweet gushy song about D&D that one of our writers sent to me. I won’t tell you which one, but his name rhymes with Tea Cake. Sort of. He’s the sweetest Tea Cake I know.
Joanna Robinson doesn’t advise you calling him Tea Cake if your face is in punching distance of his fist. Also, greetings and salutations to all you folks who friended me on facebook. It’s a brave new world.