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Say Goodbye to THESE, Michael... and Say Hello to Some New Kickstarter Campaigns!

By Rob Payne | Pajiba Love | February 6, 2013 |

By Rob Payne | Pajiba Love | February 6, 2013 |

Over the past week, several sites I visit regularly have posted articles about new Kickstarter projects that I either have or will have donated to before the end of this week. Considering how not-poorly the last campaign I plugged went, I figured P-Love is the perfect place to continue that trend. But before we become patrons of the arts, let’s indulge in some succulent schadenfreude…

Did you know that Lindsay Lohan’s mom not only wants grandchildren to babysit, but that she also considers herself one of the world’s most “misunderstood moms?” I’m not entirely sure what’s to understand about this…
…maybe that sole custody has its benefits? Can’t the Lohans and Honey Boo-Boo’s clan of slack-jawed yokels just turn into some Tetsuo Monster so we can nuke it from orbit, already? It’s the only way to be sure. (Celebitchy)

While we’re on the subject of horrific mash-ups, it looks like the makers of the found-footage compilation horror film V/H/S has discovered a way to be even more useless — by releasing it for sale on an actual VHS cassette tape. It can be yours for a solid $25! Seriously. (Amazon, h/t)

Speaking of useless things and benefits, it looks like Sarah Palin isn’t the only Fox News contributor who will be lining up for unemployment soon. Dick “Mitt Romney is Guaranteed to Win the 2012 Election” Morris’ contract was apparently also up for renewal and the fair+balanced network decided to double up on Karl Rove, who merely forced Megyn Kelly to accost their own statisticians before accepting reality, instead. (Deadline)

Let’s all enjoy that moment again, for old time’s sake:

This probably won’t be the last we ever see of Dick Morris, but to fill the void all karmic-like we’re going to be seeing even more of my heart’s true desire, actress and comedienne Judy Greer. The “Arrested Development” alum and current “Archer” cast member has reportedly signed a million dollar deal with Doubleday to publish her memoir/essay collection, and I can’t wait to read it. (THR)

Eyes up here, mister.

Continuing that sharp turn into positivity, our buddy Josh Kurp has a fairly solid list of reasons why you shouldn’t feel any guilt about your latent affection for actor and “comedian” Robin Williams. I can definitely jump on board for Creepy Robin Williams 2, the Met show (which my dad owned on VHS — full circle! — and I watched repeatedly as an impressionable youth), and the man’s own affection for Nintendo’s Legend of Zelda. (Uproxx)

For our first Kickstarter plug we have another childhood hero who has seen better days, and I swear I didn’t plan it this way. But neither did anyone working on Tim Burton’s abandoned Superman movie anticipate the Internet, and yet, thanks to this military industrial project run amok, we now have a plethora of behind-the-scenes info and details on this movie that didn’t star Nicolas Cage. Enter the hopeful new documentary, The Death of “Superman Lives”: What Happened? to compile all of it into a coherent narrative. (Comics Alliance)

I’ve never really been able to articulate exactly why, but Adult Swim’s “Boondocks” animated series never hooked me. I always loved the comic strip, but outside of a few episodes the cartoon wasn’t my cuppa. That said, this concept for The Uncle Ruckus Movie is too interesting not to back, just to see what creator Aaron McGruder has up his sleeve. And besides, the actor portraying this “white supremacist’s wet dream” was Stevie’s dad on “Malcolm in the Middle,” meaning this could be the actor’s “Breaking Bad.” (CA, too)

Ralph Bakshi, on the other hand, is a cartoon guru whose work I almost always dig. Or, at least, like McGruder, I appreciate the auteur voice at work. Now Bakshi is trying to mark his return to animation with his totally indepedent Last Days of Coney Island. The studios said the film was unmarketable, which sounds unmistakably like a Pajiban’s wet dream. (Topless Robot)

Finally, Galen Gilbert, an old buddy of mine from the film school days, is working on both a short film and a web series to be funded simultaneously, The “We’re All Gonna Die” - Dual Dark Comedy Project by Boss Astronaut Productions. Having seen what he could accomplish as a film student, I can’t wait to see what Galen the filmmaker has planned. But you don’t have to take my word for it, just take it from actor and stunt man extraordinaire Doug Jones. If you’ve got the time — and, let’s be honest, you are here — please to watch the campaign’s video:

Rob Payne also writes the comic The Unstoppable Force, tweets on the Twitter, tumbls on the Tumblr, and his wares can be purchased here. He believes in karma.

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