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Salma Hayek Brags About Not Having Altered Her Face. News Flash, Amigita, That's Not Where I'm Looking.

By Joanna Robinson | Pajiba Love | August 17, 2011 |

By Joanna Robinson | Pajiba Love | August 17, 2011 |

Awhile back, our liege lord and protector, one Dusty Rowles, was considering enabling facebook comments on the site. It’s complicated, it’s a rigamarole, he decided not to do it and I didn’t really care either way until now. This gem of a story from TechCrunch is about a commenter’s mom who tracked him down, via facebook, into the TechCrunch comments section and broke out the old, “Call your mother!” Delightful. What Pajiban personal drama could we hope to expect? The mind reels. (TechCrunch)

Speaking of meddlesome mothers, this story (stolen from the estimable Eric Snider) features my new favorite mom on the whole wide internet. She has BANNED Barbie from her household because she’s afraid of the harm it will do to her children. To her female children? Is this about body issues? No, he’s concerned about her “hot-blooded, American male children” who will, in her opinion, be scarred for life if they chance to see Barbie in the nude. I just…I…ceeeeeeeeeeeerist. (KSL)

That mom is from SLC, so I admit my first thought was “Hunh, Mormonism strikes again.” That’s certainly the case with this Virginia school board which has banned the Sherlock Holmes story “A Study In Scarlet” for anti-Mormonism language. No comment on the cocaine usage? Okay then. Virginia is for hover mothers. (NY Mag)

Speaking of censorship, Guardian critic James Donaghy has found a way around it. He’s amassed the best television reviews from Aerial Telly and published them independently. In doing that he claims, “The reviews are written very much as polemic and say a lot of things I could never say in The Guardian which is, of course, one more benefit of indie publishing.” It’s called “Television Can Blow Me” and you can buy it here. I love a good scathe and bitch, don’t you? (Amazon)

The King of the Scathe, Jon Stewart, took the Republican media to task for their skewed coverage of the Republican Presidential Candidates. So Fox News hates Ron Paul? Hmmm, the enemy of my enemy might be worth a closer look. (Mediaite)

That last link was sent to me by one of our few Republican readers (I think, right?), the lovely BierceAmbrose. He also sent me this link which points towards an amazing advance in medicine. Something that will attack a number of harmful viruses? I, of course, immediately assume it’s something our government and the superrich will conspire to keep from us normal folk. Because, say it with me now, I’ve watched too many movies. (Marginal Revolution)

Well this is awkward, I meant to talk about Salma Hayek right after that Barbie link, but I forgot. I blame the Mormons. Anyway, both she and Gwyneth Paltrow recently gave interviews on the subject of plastic surgery. GOOP drew some weird and sort of arbitrary lines about what is and what is not acceptable plastic surgery (boob job? fine! face tweak? no way!). Weird. (Evil Beet ) Salma just boasts that she’s never done anything to her face. I’m glad, lady. It’s a nice face. But holy h*ll does the rest of Hayek look swell in these photos. You had a baby, woman? Really? Dang. (Celebitchy)

From time to time, as I troll those gossip sites looking for little nuggets you might find interesting, I come across these “celebrities” I’ve never heard of. The internet was trying to make Courtney Stodden happen so hard yesterday and I had to work overtime to not figure out who she was. Still don’t know. A-thank you, blinders. A lot of the celebrity culture makes me want to invest in this incredibly inventive gadget that mutes your television any time a certain word or phrase is mentioned. This fellow chose “Kardashian.” I think I’d have to go with “Charlie Sheen.” Enjoy the silence. (Nerd Approved)

The other option is to Kaczynski myself into a cabin in the middle of nowhere and unplug. If that cabin looked something like any of these, well, I wouldn’t mind one bit. (Cabin Porn)

Ah, but if I left you, how would you ever find out about this fantastic playing card lantern? You could go to Craft, I suppose, or Nick Sayers’ flickr stream, but it wouldn’t be the same!

Seriously, without me, you might go to the grave not knowing that these Star Wars commemorative coins are legal tender on a New Zealand island. Take a gander at how much the coins cost and then look at how much they’re worth as legal tender and then join me in making some assumptions about the collective intelligence of Niue Island. (CNET)

Also, if i had Kaczynski’d myself, I wouldn’t know how adorable this “Jersey Shore” audition sketch is. Ugh, John Lithgow (aka Johnny Go Go), you’re the best thing.

Finally, here’s a movie quote mash-up/supercut that manages to rhyme. The rhythm is a little spotty in places, but overall I am mad wicked impressed.

Joanna Robinson seriously wants someone to do the math on that Star Wars coin story. You don’t have to be a Kaczynski to figure out something’s rotten on the island of Niue.

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