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People I Hate Really Need To Stop Doing Cute Things. You Hear Me, Megan Fox?!

By Joanna Robinson | Pajiba Love | November 7, 2012 |

By Joanna Robinson | Pajiba Love | November 7, 2012 |

Did we have a good Election Night, my dears? If not, my condolences and I hope you had vats of something (booze, ice cream, meths) in which to drown your sorrows. Me, well, both my guy and my gay peeps won, so I’m feeling pretty perky. I am saddened, however, to hear that Diane Sawyer is denying that she was five sheets to the wind last night. Her slurs sustained me. She’s claiming she was just tired. Okay, Diane, okay. (CB)

I was planning to link this bit o’ news today anyway, but a conversation has sparked up over on the Pajiba facebook page about whether it’s okay that a domestic abuse charity has asked folks to donate their copies of “50 Shades Of Grey” so the pages can be used as toilet paper. Is it ever okay to defile a book? Is 50 Shades actually damning to the female psyche or is it merely escapist fun? Wouldn’t the sharp edges of a Random House standard-issue page be uncomfy on your bum? (Time)

Wired has an exhaustive list of cinema’s weirdest/quaintest movie computers. I’m just delighted to see EMERAC included. (Wired)

So they’ve nailed down a Harry Potter director for the upcoming (ill-advised) Tarzan film and are now looking for some shirtless hunk to play the lead. Tom Hardy’s on the list and I think we all know he’s way too good for this project. But I don’t object to Charlie Hunnam’s name being bandied about. (FSR)

Another good choice for Tarzan is Meryl Streep’s son-in-law and former presidential Vampire Hunter, Benjamin Walker. Fortunately for Ben, he’s just signed on to an HBO pilot about the Cold War. Here’s hoping for the political intrigue of “Homeland” meets the fashionable sideburns of “Mad Men.” (Deadline)

Walker reportedly snatched that lead role from Aaron Paul. Speaking of everyone’s favorite meth cook, did you know they’re making a “Breaking Bad” porn parody? Did you know that you can watch the trailed if you follow this link? Ooooo, Jesse Pinkman’s a lady! (Breaking Bad XXX)

I hope all you East Coasters are safe from the Nor’easter that’s headed your way. Athena is it? If, however, civilization as we know it collapses and it comes to a zombie apocalypse, here are some familiar images to get you through the bites nights. (LS)

Splitsider has a fantastic list of the 50 top comedy writer/directors and their next projects. The list is alphabetical so you don’t have to be huffy about the order. It’s just a totally fun, inoffensive and informative li-AHHH NO LENA DUNHAM. LOOK AWAY, JEZZER. (Splitsider)

Can we get a standing ovation for Tammy Baldwin? (GOOD )

I’d never wear these Mutant Enemy necklaces cause I think they’re sort of dumb looking, but the Whedonite in me had to link them. (TMS)

Also, I’m not thrilled to see which “Doctor Who” villain will feature in Neil Gaiman’s upcoming episode. I think they’re among the most boring options. But, in Gaiman we trust, right? (Boing Boing)

Finally, Megan Fox did a pretty cute commercial for Acer. The opening film pitch bit is the best part, but the whole thing is pretty adorable. Damnit, Megan. My hate for you was so savory. (via io9)

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