Spoiler alert - we’ve got a sneak peak of Time’s upcoming Man of the Year and let’s just say that it’s birth-marktacular:
You know I can’t help dropping a little legalese on you - earlier this month, the Supreme Court heard “lively” argument in a case involving Jerry Falwell suing Hustler Magazine over some parodies Hustler published, and Justica Scalia got to wondering if allowing parody to go too far might keep “good people” from entering public life. Say what you will about the Supremes, at least Scalia is always the voice of reason and protection of individual rights. (Milwaukee Journal)
Speaking of good people, earlier today, Gary Hart announced that he’s throwing his hat back into the presidential ring, sex scandal be damned. I for one support him, and suspect this is the last we’ll see of the media digging into the meaningless sex lives of our public officials. (C-SPAN)
Ok, enough politics and law. Some of our foreign readers may have heard of this Austrian thing called Red Bull. I tried it recently and there must be some mis-translation going on because it’s labeled an “energy drink” and I think that’s supposed to say “tastes like herpes.” Good luck selling that swill state-side. (Red Bull)
Speaking of energy, last week a friend of mine argued that “Moonlighting” was running out of energy since David and Maddie hooked up earlier this year, to which I say, nonsense. It’s still a top 10 show in the most recent ratings, and doesn’t show any meaningful signs of tapering off. (Spokane Chronicle)
In other ratings-talk, “Alf” has been killing it lately, and is damn close to creeping into the top ten. It’s about damned time, too! Anyway, for some reason our own Harry Hanrahan was inspired to make this supercut of all the commercials that ran during last night’s “Alf” Christmas Special and, as always, it’s a work of art:
…I don’t know why we haven’t been talking more about that Leonard, Part 6 movie, it looks like Bill Cosby at his f*cking best!
You know who else is at their f*cking best? The Buffalo Bills, who absolutely trounced the Colts (suck it, Dustin!) last Sunday. That Eric Dickerson sure can run, and with that new Jim Kelly kid throwing the ball, I wouldn’t be surprised to see these guy rack up three or four Super Bowl rings before all is said and done. (Pro Football Reference)
Sunday night, after watching that there football game, I was watching “The Tracey Ullman Show” over on Fox. It’s a pretty great show y’all should check out - I hear ya, the notion of good TV over on that other dial seems silly, but trust, this show good. Anyway, there was yet another of these god damned Simpsons shorts. Can we just put this dead horse out of its misery already:
And speaking of things that need to be put out of their misery, I know this video has been airing on MTV like crazy of late, but can we all agree that this Guns N’ Roses things is done? The way that dude dances around like a snake. The stupid hat on the guitarist. Come on already.
Going back to something I was talking about before, seriously, “Alf.” Will we ever get sick of Gordon Shumway? Seems unlikely. And in fact, this kick-ass Alf doll is one of the hot Christmas sellers in the kiddy stores right now:
Y’all can have your Cabbage Patch Dolls and Koosh Balls, my lil’s nephew’s gonna unwrap himself a doll that’ll talk to him about eating cats!
Lastly, since Dustin wasn’t able to cover last weekend’s box office roundup, I’ll note that 3 Men and a Baby got knocked down to second place by the new Throw Momma From the Train, while the newly-released Wall Street came in third, causing Planes, Trains & Automobiles and Fatal Attraction to fall to fourth and fifth, and knocking The Running Man straight out of the top five. I think these movies will all continue to have a great December box office, given that this weekend only sees Broadcast News and Moonstruck opening. A movie about the news, and a movie starring Cher? Please.
There’s very little on the horizon for the rest of the month too (unless someone’s actually clamoring to see Robin Williams in some Vietnam movie). But hold tight because in two weeks, well this just looks gnarly: