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For Frak's Sake, They're Just Crunch Berries! MOVE YOUR DAMN CART!

By Miscellaneous | Pajiba Love | October 26, 2010 |

By Miscellaneous | Pajiba Love | October 26, 2010 |

Because buying groceries is apparently the most confusing and brain-challenging fucking task in the entire goddamn world, here’s a look at the inner-monologues of those assholes at the grocery store who block aisles, let their kids run around screaming, and generally make what is already a boring task a fucking hassle and a half. (Hobo Trashcan)

Here are nine movie actresses who are pretty much getting by on their looks alone. To be honest, I really don’t see how Jennifer Lopez is getting by period at this point, and seriously? Gabourey Sidibe is on the list? You’re shittin’ me here, right? (Screen Junkies)

FUCKING FUCK YES! It’s official everyone: The City, the spinoff of The Hills which was a spinoff of Laguna Beach, is getting canceled, which means no more of these fucking people on TV! STEVE HOLT! Sure, they’ll probably fill the void with more Jersey Shore and Teen Mom, but for now, please just give me this one small victory. (popbytes)

Today’s quiz is all about Christine O’Donnell Witches! Yes, I know, that was an easy joke, but I wouldn’t be making them if the bitch didn’t make it so goddamn easy and fun. Anyway, whip out your witchy know-how, you’re gonna need it. (Litely Salted)

So in case you haven’t heard by now (Janet.), Glee is doing a Rocky Horror Picture Show-inspired episode this week (Janet.), so here’s a behind-the-scenes look (Janet). Also, I like the new guy and all (Janet.), but where’s Puck? (The Flickcast)

With the Back To The Future box-set coming out soon, let’s take a look at some of the time-related plot holes in the movies. Because if Inception has taught me anything, it’s that you should always let random, meaningless details ruin a perfectly good movie. (Den Of Geek)

Oh well this is nice: 250 college athletes in Ohio walked a mile in high-heel shoes to raise awareness of domestic abuse. Yeah, I tried that all of once; a sprained ankle pretty much ensured I’ll never try it twice. (Zelda Lily)

Katy Perry and Russell Brand were married this weekend on a Tiger reserve in India. As it turns out, there’s a reason people usually don’t get married on Tiger reserves: BECAUSE FUCKING TIGERS WILL ATTACK YOUR GUESTS. (Yeeeah!)

So by now, most of you are probably aware of my general hatred for Seinfeld, right? Right. Well, I’m temporarily lifting my ban on anything Seinfeld because this parody comic showing the gang playing Dungeons and Dragons is actually pretty goddamn clever. (Unreality)

Taylor Swift has a song on her new album about an actress who’s better known for being a floozy (floozy, by the way, is the general term for those moments when you’re not sure what kind of sex-freak someone is). Harsh Taylor Swift. Harsh. To be fair, maybe you’d get some too if you stopped dating gay dudes. (Evil Beet)

Just because I love a good spooky story (NOT a ghost story. Ghosts aren’t real and anyone who says otherwise is selling something), here are seven creepy urban legends that are actually totally true. And yeah, I totally found out about the “rat in your plumbing” thing after reading an Augusten Burroughs book. I didn’t shower for a three days afterwards. (Cracked)

And now, presented without comment: Antoine Dogson. (Okay, maybe one comment: Hide yo kids, hide you wife, because they humping everybody’s legs!) (BWE)

Thanks to Lucas, here’s a song about all the stupid, tired cliches TV Dramas roll out at the end of the show. Fun fact: Part of the reason I gave up on Grey’s Anatomy was because I couldn’t stand watching Meredith cry in her bed while an indie song plays in the background.

Jeremy Feist is a freelance writer, maker of lovin’, and an average-everyday-sane-psycho. You can check his NSFW blog here, or email him here.

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