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August 11, 2008 |

By Stacey Nosek | Pajiba Love | August 11, 2008 |

Pajiba Love

Hey, uh, guys…? What the eff happened this weekend? Is there some kind of “Final Destination” type curse that’s killing off America’s beloved black entertainers? If so, Samuel L. Jackson better watch his motherbleeping back. (IDLYITW)

Meet the brand new Lara Croft, everybody! Wait a minute, there’s going to be a new Tomb Raider movie? Christ. (WIMB)

Well, I can’t say I’m not disappointed, but if you were as handsome as John Edwards you might have a hard time keeping your dick in your pants, too. (Deus Ex Malcontent)

Good thing this campaign has far more important issues to focus on, though — like which candidate gets Angelina Jolie’s endorsement! Yippie fuck! (Celebitchy)

Of course, what we should really be concerned with is that poor old man McCain isn’t getting his beauty rest. (QuizLaw)

Matthew McConaughey has dreams of someday passing a lush, bountiful placenta orchard down to his kids and grandkids. (The Blemish)

Like my parents’ house isn’t full of enough tacky crap already, my Mom would have a stroke if she saw this. (Gallery of the Absurd)

So my birthday’s coming up later this month… And if you really, really love your salty Lovemaster, I found the perfect gift. Oh, please please please? (mental floss)

If you want yourself on the run from brain-eating zombies, here are the basics of forming a Zombie Survivor Group. (ZombieForecast)

Had actually watched the opening ceremonies of the Olympic Games, I may very well have crapped my pants. (BestWeekEver)

Ramen noodles are finally offering a healthy line of noodles, so poor college students won’t have to worry about high blood pressure and cholesterol killing them before the student loans are paid off. (TIB)

After the jump: why old people shouldn’t be allowed to drive; a PSA. (Thanks to Jeremy!)

Pajiba Love | August 11, 2008 |

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