Unless he gets one of those post-brain hemorrhage case of the “narms,” it looks as though Bret Michaels will be courting loose women, whining about his diabeetus and hiding his receding hairline behind bandannas for years to come. (Yeeeah!)
Oh, apparently it was “Frank Sinatra Week” on “American Idol,” the week in which Frank Sinatra spins in his grave because a bunch of assholes are butchering his songs on television. (Hairballs)
Elton John’s concert in Egypt has been cancelled because he’s gay and he also called Jesus gay. Come on now. It’s not like he’s trying to bedazzle your pyramids for fuck’s sake. (Evil Beet)
iPhones are so 2009. I’m getting myself one of these sweet messenger hawks. (Holy Taco)
So, Miley Cyrus has a new video out that’s all weird and slutty, but you know? I’m over it. The most troubling thing here is that the song is goddamn terrible. (Litelysalted)
Oreo has a new limited edition “DQ Blizzard Creme” cookie … and am I crazy but what the hell is the point of an ice cream flavored cookie? There IS NO POINT. (Impulsive Buy)
Here are ten actors who were originally cast in roles they turned down. I would have liked to see DeNiro do the “jimmy jimmy coco pop.” (Unreality)
This clip of the “Tyra” show has got to be the most uncomfortable thing I’ve ever watched on television. Including the last three minutes of this week’s “Breaking Bad.” OK, I actually watched both things on the computer, but still. (Warming Glow)
Russel Crowe is now the #1 cause of incidents of subway violence. (Film Drunk)
Apropos of nothing, here is Christina Hendricks at the Met’s Costume Institute Gala over the weekend. Holy Christ, is it me or do those things get bigger every time I see them? (Celebslam)
Here are the 11 best drug-induced movie scenes. (Screen Junkies)
It turns out Corey Haim didn’t die from a drug overdose after all, but from a bunch of big medical words I don’t understand. Now don’t we all feel like jerks. (DListed)
Because it’s a slow news day today, here’s a Goonies quiz to kill a few minutes. (mental floss)
After watching this video, I have decided that “watching Paul Rudd dance” is definitely the best job anyone could ever have. You lose, professional candy samplers.
Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.