I didn’t mention this yesterday because it smelled like bullshit and they seemed so cute and lovey-dovey at the Oscars, but apparently Sandra Bullock’s husband Jesse James really has been having an affair with some 24-year-old skanky tattooed porn star. Looks like my bullshit detector is broken. (Yeeeah!)
Jessica Simpson’s new VH1 show “The Price of Beauty” premiered this week to abysmal ratings. At this point, I’m almost sad to see Jessica Simpson fail, but seriously y’all … That show sounds boring as shit. (Litelysalted)
“American Idol” is finally down to the final 12, and as a special treat last night “Ke$ha” performed, taking “gutter-howling shit to new highs and lows.” (Hairballs)
THIS is the most amazing thing ever, as in, amazingly horrible. If you can’t deal with the fact that your dog has a butthole, maybe you shouldn’t be a pet owner. Or ever procreate. Thanks, Sarina! (The Nerdist)
Here are the undeniable similarities between nerds and sports fans. Shit, I’ve been saying this for years. (Topless Robot)
Adorable Abigail Breslin wants to do more dark, horror-type movies … But someone needs to tell her Twilight ain’t horror. (Bloody Disgusting)
In totally random news, Chelsea Handler and Jay Mohr are embroiled in a feud. Yeah, gonna award this one to Chelsea. Jay Mohr’s sitcom makes “Two and a Half Men” look cerebral and homeboy is looking rough. (Celebslam)
Here’s a brief clip of a teaser for Will Ferrel and Mark Wahlberg’s The Other Guys. Mark Wahlberg is such a blandy mcblanderson actor that sometimes I forget that he was actually funny in I Heart Huckabees. (The Playlist)
Rose McGowan is the latest to be cast in the remake on Conan. Meh. Does anyone care? I don’t. (Gordon and the Whale)
Sasha Grey, the pornstar who made a transition of sorts in The Girlfriend Experience, will be playing a a fundamentalist Christian virginity-keeping teen in her next role. Because it’s soooo ironic, get it? (Agent Bedhead)
Tina Fey is on the cover of this month’s Esquire magazine, posting in a new sexy, ridicadonk photoshoot. (Celebitchy)
If you’re like me, the cheesy 80’s movie Just One of the Guys was a cable TV staple of your youth, along with Lover Boy and that C. Thomas Howell blackface movie. And now you can watch it for free online! (Cinematical)
I don’t know if this clip will be funny to anyone who hasn’t seen “The Room” yet, but here goes anyway: The Room … With PUPPIES.
Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.