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Social Interaction Is For Suckers

By Miscellaneous | Pajiba Love | September 2, 2010 |

By Miscellaneous | Pajiba Love | September 2, 2010 |

Here are the four levels of social entrapment from Allie Brosh. For the record: In High School, there was this weird guy who followed me around everywhere and got off at the same bus stop as I did, so for an entire year, I used to pretend I lived in a house two blocks away just so he wouldn’t know where I lived. The occupants of that house were surprisingly cool about the whole thing. (Hyperbole and a Half)

How big of a nerd are you? Well, if you can get anything over a C on this Norse Mythology, you’re probably a colossal nerd. And now you know. (Litely Salted)

So the marketing team behind The Virginity Hit decided to market their shitty movie by running billboards for a virginity help line, and now people are up in arms over the “offensive” billboard rather than the incredibly shitty movie being forced on them. (Agent Bedhead)

In today’s “Good Guy, Bad Idea” story, Seth Green is working on a real-time reality show where viewers can and will decide every aspect of a guy’s life. Yeah, there’s no way the internet can’t totally fuck this up. (Screen Junkies)

Alright guys, quick question: Kellan Lutz. Would you hit it? Yeah, he had a bit part in Twilight and Nightmare on Elm Street, but he’s also very, very pretty and I’m pretty sure you can grate cheese on his abs, and I fucking love cheese. (popbytes)

And speaking of very pretty men who make terrible movies, here are five classic action hero fights that need to happen. The rest I can take or leave, but Dwayne Johnson oiled up and ready to fight… I’ll be in my bunk. (Unreality)

Alright, you guys remember the guy who reviewed the Star Wars movies, right? Well he’s back reviewing the Star Trek movie now, and it’s just as insane and hilarious. (Topless Robot)

Ha ha, Paris Hilton’s stupid wonk-eye is getting blacklisted from every club in Las Vegas for cocaine possession. Normally, I’d just write this off as blatant hypocrisy, but because it’s Paris Hilton, all I can say is AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! FACE! (Celebslam)

I know I’ve been pretty hard on Outsourced these past few days. Well, if these clips are any indication, I was entirely right about it too. Come for the “Haha, it’s funny because they’re different!” jokes, stay because you just can’t look away from the 30-something fat Indian guy singing the Pussycat Dolls song. (The Flickcast)

Remember kids: Never write a story about Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore, or else they will threaten to sue you on Twitter. Seriously, you couldn’t just hire a PR guy or something? (Celebitchy)

Remember that video of the insane sociopathic chick who threw screaming puppies into a river? Well, Michael Bay isn’t too pleased about it and he’s now offering $50,000 for information leading to her arrest. Wait, when did Michael Bay become cool? (Cinematical)

Did you know there’s a cocktail out there called “The Jessica Rabbit” made of crystallized ginger, vodka and carrot juice? Well, there is. If there’s a drink called “The Betty Boop”, I would love to see a deathmatch between the two. (B-Side Blog)

Look! More drinking news! Absolut developed a new drink called Lemon Drop, and they even made a nifty little B-Movie for it starring Ali Larter. Sweeeeet. (Frothy Girlz)

Good news, everyone! Thanks to your tireless voting, eloquent Angry Black Lady won the Black Weblog Award for Blog to Watch! Let’s all give ourselves a pat on the back and a shot of tequila down the throat for this most epic of wins. VICTORY SCREECH! (AngryBlackLadyChronicles)

Good: Robyn performs an incredible cover of Bjork’s Hyperballad while Bjork sits in the front row. Better: Bjork looks like she’s about to jump out of her seat and strangle Robyn in cold blood. Best: Bjork is dressed up as a very angry pinata.

Jeremy Feist is a freelance writer, maker of lovin’, and an average-everyday-sane-psycho. You can check his NSFW blog here, or email him here.

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