Oh, Zach Galifianakis, You Often Make Me Chortle, But Today I Guffaw
I know, I know, I told you yesterday that I wouldn’t talk about the Rapture anymore. But it’s not my fault nobody told me there was a photo of a raptured Storm Trooper. (Uproxx)
Listen, blah blah blah Apocalypse, have we noticed that there are ALREADY SPIDERS THAT CAN EAT BIRDS? (Wired)
Thankfully insects don’t live too long. (Sigh, yes, arachnids too.) It’s those giant tortoises we must keep an eye on. You too, pearl mussel, don’t think I didn’t see you there, tricksy mollusk.
Doesn’t Tricksy Mollusk have a nice ring to it? Mayhap you are thinking it should be the name of your first-born child. If so, I hope you don’t live in Germany as they have very strict naming laws there. Some are for the good of the children, some are just…arbitrary. Pepsi-Cola is a no-go but Pepsi-Carola is a-ok? Whatever you say, Germany. (Zoetropic)
Thankfully most of us live in the US of A where we are free to be you and me and to get Daisy Buchanan tattooed on our biceps. Seriously, of all the literary characters in all the world and you pick HER?! Don’t talk to me about American Dream metaphors, I won’t hear it. (20 Awesome Literary Tattoos)
The leaders of this freedom-loving and dubiously-tattooed nation, Michelle and Barack Obama, are having sort of a hell of a time in the U.K. right now. First Michelle got caught in a London bluster, and then there was that embarrassing business with their car getting stuck on a curb in Ireland. I know I’m not supposed to link to this paper, but the infographic on the armored Presidential vehicle is too great. HAVE AT THEE. (Daily Mail)
Speaking of other American treasures, who doesn’t love the Beastie Boys. The AV Club loves them SO much they’ve collected 170 pop culture references from the Beastie Boys ouvre. It’s an impressive feat of cultural archeology. (AV Club)
Do you watch “The Good Wife?” No? Just my grandma and me? Okay, well, Juliana Margulies is pretty fantastic on it and here she is being fantastic in real life talking about the entrenched sexism of network television. You know I like feminism and stuff. Also, her hair is pretty. (Jezebel)
Pretty hair will not save January Jones. Not from my ire and not from the scathe of Zach Galifianakis. Seriously, don’t piss off a comic. Their sword is their tongue and it never rusts. (Celebitchy)
Yes, you’re right, of course, January Jones is just a dull and vapid actress and I should save my ire for people who deserve it. How about this child molester who was given a full pardon so his wife could open up a daycare center in their home?! WHAT ON EARTH IS GOING ON HERE?! (City Pages)
Okay, I’m going to calm myself with this video of a young man showing off his new bionic arm. He can tie his own shoes now! My heart, it runneth over!
Finally, nothing makes me happier than a little Doctor Who-themed science geekery. This Tesla coil demo took place at The Maker Fair in California this past weekend. (Home town pride, what what!) I’m going to pretend this is the first time I’ve seen Tesla coils set to music and that I didn’t watch that abomination The Sorcerer’s Apprentice. Oh, just watch the video. (UPDATED: Now with Adam Savage and his slick dance moves)