Congratulations, Shailene Woodley. Welcome to the wonderful world of feminism! (Lainey)

Halle and Keanu are dating, so say rumors that I choose to believe are gospel. (Dlisted)

Johnny Depp suddenly looks a very hard 54 years old. (Celebitchy)

“Good for you, Alexandria Daddario! Make that Kleenex money!” That’s a fun quote out of context. (GFY)

I’m not trying to be weird or anything, but Melania Trump hasn’t been seen for 24 days. This started to get strange last week. (Jezebel)

Trying to imagine the reaction if a previous president had a record of beating and raping his first wife, emotionally abusing his second wife, sexually assaulting multiple women…and then his third wife is abruptly hospitalized and not seen for 17 days and counting

— Sarah Kendzior (@sarahkendzior) May 29, 2018

Meanwhile, one of the few things we HAVE heard from her was probably written by Donald.

And I’m sure it’s a total coincidence, but today, Giuliani said that there was nothing that Donald Trump could be indicted for, up to and including the murder of James Comey.

Giuliani really said "Trump could have shot James Comey and still couldn't be indicted for it."

Yeah, someone better check on Melania.

— Denizcan S. (@MrFilmkritik) June 3, 2018

Brian DePalma wants to direct a Harvey Weinstein inspired horror movie, which sounds like a downright terrible idea. (The Mary Sue)

It’s been TWO weeks, Pete Davidson. Slow it down, brother. (Buzzfeed)

This movie is either a trainwreck that needs to be re-worked, or it’s being prepped for Oscar season.

In a surprise turn of events, A24 has delayed the release of UNDER THE SILVER LAKE from June 22nd to December 7th, 2018. pic.twitter.com/KnybjuFJp3

— Talk Film Society (@TalkFilmSoc) June 1, 2018

Jesus Christ, Joy Reid. You’ve got enough skeletons in your blog closet to fill a graveyard. (The Root)

It’s like “between two ferns” only more like “standing in all the plants, forever”. This is not a complaint.

🙏🏾 @esquire #ElvisMitchell @MelPhoto_Film @JayFielden @MichaelHainey @EmilyPoenisch pic.twitter.com/dS9LO4c1ld

— Chadwick Boseman (@chadwickboseman) May 31, 2018

Hey! If I told you that Aya Cash and Noel Wells were starring in a romantic comedy together, how excited would you be? Now, what if I told you that Josh Radnor was the other lead? A real weenie-shrinker, huh? (Collider)

Conversely, if I told you that Blake Lively was starring in a spy film, how excited would you be? OK, but what if I told you that it also starred Sterling K. Brown? (Shadow and Act)

READ THE ROOM, BRETT RATNER. GOD. (/Film)

This man never stops being amazing.

Week one down of our anti-fuckface satire, Jojo Rabbit. Can't wait to share it with the world. Also, what better way to insult Hitler than having him portrayed by a Polynesian Jew?
🖕 #FuckYouShitler @jojorabbitmovie @foxsearchlight pic.twitter.com/bNZ2YlDgaF

— Taika Waititi (@TaikaWaititi) June 1, 2018

Well, I know what I’m listening to during my next workout.

The Good Place: The Podcast is LIVE:https://t.co/2zhyJ1oLJn
Ep. 1 features show creator Mike Schur.
Future episodes include:@TedDanson @IMKristenBell @DarcyCarden @jameelajamil @mjacint0 @dubjackharper @meganamram @JoeMande @AlanMYang
SUBSCRIBE TODAY.@nbcthegoodplace

— Marc Evan Jackson (@MarcEvanJackson) June 1, 2018

This story is insane, and makes us realize just how non-stop the cottage industry of Islamophobic twitter hate works. (HuffPo)

Meanwhile, linguistics writer Debbie Cameron talks about Samantha Bee and the history of the c-word. (DeBuk)

We didn’t even know that Laura Prepon had divorced the less awful Masterson, and yet, here she is married to Ben Foster! (Twitter)

Do you want to say fuck cancer but can’t participate in Cannonball Read 10? You can still support CBR’s cancer fundraising efforts and look good doing it by buying some of their swanky 10th Anniversary Celebration merch. And if the t-shirts, mugs or totebags don’t suit your fancy, you can also donate directly to their cause of sticking it to cancer, one book at a time. (Cannonball Read 10)

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.