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Ashton Kutcher & Mila Kunis's Secret-Wedding and Enough Soccer Sexism to Start Your Week Off Angry

By Vivian Kane | Pajiba Love | July 6, 2015 |

By Vivian Kane | Pajiba Love | July 6, 2015 |

This new Fear the Walking Dead teaser is really highlighting the show’s Los Angeles setting, and you know what that means. BIKINI ZOMBIES! (Uproxx)

Go Fug Yourself’s women’s soccer coverage is surprisingly snarkless, though it’s hard to notice with all this dust in here. No, you’re crying! (GFY)

The Twitter account for the UK women’s soccer team would like to remind us ladies that no matter how strong of an athlete you are, that’s still only like fifth on the list of things that define you. You know, after “walking uterus.” (Mediaite)

Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Martin are apparently NOT broken up after all and oh my god I can’t even pretend to care about this anymore. As long as she stays away from Sean Penn (my new primary concern for any potentially single woman in Hollywood), that’s all I care about. (Lainey)

As for the more stable actor couples, Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis got secret-married this weekend. Jackie + Kelso 4ever! (DListed)

Lindsay Lohan may not have a job or any money, but she does have standards, apparently. And those do not involve doing really weird-sounding Burger King commercials. (Celebitchy)

If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to be abandoned by your hero at a Phish concert, our own Brock Wilbur has some thoughts. (Baeble)

This new trailer for A Series of Unfortunate Events turned out to be fan-made, not official. It’s so good, though, that Netflix should hire whoever created it to make the whole damn show. (Mary Sue)

If you laugh at these in-game billboards from GTA V, don’t feel ashamed. Just accept the fact that there is a tiny 12-year-old inside your brain, running your sense of humor. Just like the rest of us. (Dorkly)

Colbert’s temporary Late Show marquee is a GREAT ad… for pizza. (USA Today)

This has been in talks for a while, but this iconic Bay Area tunnel is OFFICIALLY being renamed for Robin Williams, guaranteeing 50% more daily tears for all Marin County commuters. (BuzzFeed)

How do you judge a book that’s based on other source material? Alwaysanswerb asks that question in her review of the Jane Eyre-inspired novel, The Flight of Gemma Hardy by Margot Livesey. Do you take points off for the source material doing the heavy lifting of the plot? Or do you just go with the flow? (Cannonball Read 7)

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