I Wasn't The Only One Waiting For The Triumphant De-Shirting, Was I? Er, I Mean, Girl Power! USA!!
Okay, we all know I don’t do sports. It’s well-documented. But, my striking strikers and heavenly headers, I was cheering with the rest of you when the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team bent it like Beckham this weekend. I might have even exclaimed “DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES?!?” Yeah, I’ve seen a few sports movies, why do you ask? (The Mary Sue)
And I’m just kidding (mostly) about that Brandi Chastain-inspired shirtless comment. My love of cleavage is also well-documented, but I’m not a monster. For instance, I am mostly offended by this Everything You Need To Know About Boobs infographic. But then, then, they made a word cloud out of all the boobphemisms. A Cleavage Cloud?!?! That’s like my kryptonite. (Bro Bible)
But while we’re down here in the gutter, let’s all take a gander at my lord and master’s magnum O-Face opus over at Uproxx. That’s right, our very own Dustin Rowles has amassed, for your viewing pleasure, the best O-Faces of American’s TV reporters. My favorite has to be the Bill O’Reilly. PAPA BEAR! (Uproxx)
Speaking of O-Faces, it’s hard to take Jon Hamm/Don Draper as seriously after spending some quality time on Emotions With Jon Hamm last week. “Mad Men” really needs to come back. Until then, this will have to tide me over. What Would Don Draper Do? (The Oatmeal)
I suppose, my fellow fantasists, that Jon Hamm/Don Draper conflation is just one in a long line of actors/roles I have difficulty separating. For instance, I follow Stephen Fry on Twitter because I’m secretly convinced he is the reincarnation of Oscar Wilde. (Which is why this nonsense over the weekend bothered me.) And I’ll admit when I saw that Reese Witherspoon met the Royal Newlyweds, I was surprised she wasn’t wearing an Elle Woodsian shade of pink. (Celebitchy)
Quizas, mis corredores queridos, Witherspoon chose to wear red as an homage to the running of the bulls that is currently taking place in Pamplona. Well, probably not, but these photos from the San Fermin festival are gorgeous. (In Focus)
If I were ever to muster up los ovarios to run with the bulls, all you would hear from me is one long “F**************************************CK” (or “CH*NGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHRRRRRGGGGGGAAAAHHHHH” if I were feeling nasty). In honor of that, America’s favorite swear word, here is a round-up of TV’s most memorable F-words. And yes, there is video and yes, Malcolm Tucker is well-represented. (Warming Glow)
Speaking of volatile Brits, I hope you’ve been following this explosive phone hacking scandal. I think my favorite part so far is the giant f*ck you the employees of the “News of the World” gave their boss…via crossword. (The Guardian)
Speaking of hidden messages, is anyone else having a hard time figuring out Google+? Well, not a hard time but a lazy time? I’m fairly lazy myself when it comes to technology so I really dug these 20 Tips To Enhance Your Google Plus Experience. Yeah, okay, so he explains how to mute a post twice. MUTING A POST IS IMPORTANT. (Web Trickz)
Does Peter Jackson have a Google+ account? If he did, I would be all over that because I find him utterly delightful. Here is his second video blog from the set of The Hobbit. Don’t tell anyone I said this, but I sometimes find his set videos more entertaining than his films. Ahem, King Kong (MovieLine)
Speaking of utterly delightful, here is a lovely instructional video on how to moonwalk. I know, I know, it’s about 20 years too late for you to impress the honeys. What if you did it ironically. I mean, the man is wearing a sweatband…that has to be hipster irony, right?
I’ll close today’s jockular P. Love with another sports item. This is an unbelievably cool skiing video. If you’re at work, my little lodge bunnies, you can watch it with the sound off. The trance-y music really only detracts. Enjoy!
Joanna Robinson is pretty sure everyone is on Google+ now, right? Everyone but her mom?