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Here's the Ultra Disturbing Reason Why Tom Cruise and John Travolta Can Presumably Never Leave Scientology

By Vivian Kane | Pajiba Love | March 11, 2015 |

By Vivian Kane | Pajiba Love | March 11, 2015 |

Are you ready for some ‘sexy zombies’ on the Walking Dead spinoff? Well, too bad. Kim Dickens says we’re getting them anyway. (Uproxx)

Also over on Uproxx, if you can’t get the Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt theme song out of your head, Courtney has the full extended version, complete with lyrics (dammit). It’s a miracle! (Uproxx)

And while we’re on the subject of Kimmy Schmidt, that show is one of the best comedies in years, but maybe let’s take just a minute to talk about that super weird Native American subplot, shaaaaalllll we? (Vulture)

The big story this week surrounding the tragic death of Sarah Jones was that director Randall Miller plead guilty to criminal trespass and involuntary manslaughter. Now First AD Hillary Schwartz has also been found guilty and sentenced to 10 years probation (plus a pretty finite ban from her chosen career). (Deadline)

The HBO documentary reportedly suggests big celebrities like John Travolta and Tom Cruise should leave Scientology for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is how the ‘church’ tortures and harasses its members. After years of telling their deep dark secrets to Xenu, though, that’s not really a possibility. (Business Insider)

Brace yourselves: Ashton Kutcher made a really good point. Men’s restrooms really should have baby changing stations, shouldn’t they? (Publisher’s note: No! It’s our excuse to avoid diaper changes in restaurants! — DR) (Celebitchy)

Aziz Ansari got some really weird backlash after his Letterman feminism rant. Did his words solve misogyny? No, of course not, they were just awesome and hilarious and powerful so leave him the crap alone. (Jezebel)

Surprising news to no one: Americans want Tina Fey to take over The Daily Show. Surprising news to probably a lot of us: Dennis Miller is still a thing? (AV Club)

Johnny Depp injured his hand while filming Pirates of the Caribbean: Whatever Number We’re Up To and— yes of course, oh no, that’s terrible. But also… did he just make himself a duct tape cast and call it a day? (Lainey)

Are you watching the Adult Wednesday Addams webseries? YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY BE WATCHING THE ADULT WEDNESDAY ADDAMS WEBSERIES. (Daily Dot)

There are other words I want to say about Adult Neville Longbottom, but I can’t seem to make it past hamanahamanahamana… (Yahoo)

The incredible Postmodern Jukebox is back with their specific brand of jazzy goodness, Coolio style this time. (YouTube)

These 10 words that we’ve forgotten how to pronounce is wonderful, but I KNOW that if I start pronouncing ‘forehead’ like I want to, it would get me laughed off of the entire planet. (The Week)

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