In case you didn’t know it, gentle readers, today Stacey Nosek, Original Link Wench and all around Cool Chick, is getting hitched. Several Pajiban writers and commenters are surely, at this moment, wriggling into their powder blue ruffled tuxes and magenta taffeta gowns in anticipation of Stacey’s kickass day. Prisco is a groomsman. Need I say more? So for Stacey, I present to you, A Very Matrimonial Pajiba Love. No, not all the links are STRICTLY wedding themed, but I’ll let Miss Amy Pond clue you into how I got around that:
This link is old, but good. By good I mean delicious. Here the always hilarious Allie Brosh debates the merits of pie versus cake. I’ve been to two weddings this summer and missed the cake ceremony at both. What? I was kidnapping the groom the first time and scrawling all over the happy couple’s car the second time. Also? I sort of like it when couples go a non-traditional route with the cake. WEDDING PIE FOR EVERYONE! (Hyperbole And A Half)
But the oldest link I could probably find for you, is this one of The First Thing I Ever Remember Seeing On The Internet. What’s the first thing you remember seeing? (Know Your Meme)
The Second Thing I Ever Remember Seeing On The Internet is this cat, The Peter Pan Guy. Do you remember him? Well apparently he got married. To a lady. Okay?! Congrats! (Urlesque)
Okay, let’s have some new links, shall we? They say, after folks get married, the spark in the boudoir can diminish. So perhaps it’s a good thing Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie never officially married because allegedly Miss Jolie is a bit of a wildcat in the sack. You know, I don’t like reporting on these word of mouth stories, but, I mean, I think we could all see this one coming. (Celebitchy)
Also new to me is this concept that muppets Bert and Ernie are supposed to be kids. Okay, let’s back up. There’s a petition requesting “Sesame Street” have Bert & Ernie get gay married to each other because it would be a good model for kids to see a married gay couple on the TV. Okay, but this article alleges Bert and Ernie are supposed to be children and children shouldn’t marry. Um, aren’t they roommates? Aren’t they essentially Oscar and Felix? I never once thought of them as kids. Elmo, sure. That little annoying yellow one, why not! (The Mary Sue)
This part’s easy. All my links are borrowed. This one comes from io9 and gives you some tips on how to watch the Perseid Meteor Shower this morning. Maybe some of the Pajiba Wedding revelers will still be up late enough to catch the show. (io9)
Um, was the portrait below from Van Gogh’s blue period? Let’s say it was. Some clever chap has done a series of portraits comprised of one tiny word or phrase repeated over and over. The Van Gogh one is made up of “genius,” whereas Marilyn Monroe’s is made up of her famous measurements. I could make a sexism comments here, but it’s Wedding Day, so I shan’t. (Laughing Squid)
For those of you here who are married or have been married. Were you nervous on The Big Day? I imagine it must be a terrifying/exhilarating feeling. Possibly akin to the feeling I get looking at these rooftop photos. Vertigorgeous. (My Modern Metropolis)
Admit it. You thought Russell Brand was an idiot, didn’t you? I’VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU HE ISN’T. But no, you scoff. Anyway, on the heels of his touching tribute to Amy Winehouse comes this thoughtful piece on the London Riots. I sort of want to marry him, and that’s not just the wedding champers talking. (The Guardian)
Finally, my dears, we have this timely nugget from Michele Bachmann. I know I said I wouldn’t talk sexism but in a recent interview Bachmann likened wifely submission to respect. I’m not sure how to take that. I want to hop on the HOW DARE SHE bandwagon. You know, cause I hate her. But in any marriage or relationship, mutual respect means occasionally giving over? Yes? That could be interpreted as submission. Right? As long as both people are doing it? I DON’T KNOW. I’M TRYING NOT TO BE HATEFUL. (Jezebel)
Here’s a toast to Stacey. May the road rise to meet you, my the rain be always at your back and may you have some batsh*t insane drugged out cousin or druncle at your reception to dance his ass off.
And, to close, I’m going to get a little sappy. JUST BE GLAD THE LOVE ACTUALLY VERSION IS UNEMBEDDABLE YOU CYNICS. Also, um, are the lads chewing gum?
Joanna Robinson sincerely hopes Stacey is not reading this on her wedding day. She hopes instead that Ms. Nosek is being primped and pampered. If Stacey does see this eventually, please drop your well wishes to her in the comments! LOVE LOVE LOVE!