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PureFlix and Make America Kittens Again is Your Weird Censorship News of the Day

By Bekka Supp | Streaming | December 20, 2016 |

By Bekka Supp | Streaming | December 20, 2016 |


Looks like Netflix has some stiff competition. Variety reported that faith-based streaming service PureFlix will being offering its services today. The streaming service is specifically catered toward evangelicals. Users will be able to select from a Christian and family programming library of roughly 5,000 titles that feature Christian movies, and quality, wholesome shows like The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet and The Donna Reed Show.

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Wait. Is that Edward Herrmann?

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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

The platform promises users “no language, sex, or violence surprises.” Basically, anything you’ve ever loved about any show ever, their entire catalog will not have. Bad news for those who mostly watch shows centered around a favorite theme of “comeuppance.” PureFlix has partnered with ClearPlay — a filtering service — to allow its most conservative viewers the chance to delete language that they find offensive (“hell” and “damn” being the most egregious, I guess.) If you’re like me, and sorry if you are, you were probably hoping they’d take regular movies and edit them with nonsensical censored movie lines. No such luck.

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Courtesy of the fine folks over at Short List

But no language? That’s a bold move, PureFlix. Before climbing that hill, can we maybe talk about your logo kerning? Because it’s giving off anything but “pure” thoughts.

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In other weird censoring news, a South Carolina bill would block porn unless you pay. This piece of legislation, the Human Trafficking Prevention Act, was pre-filed this month by Rep. Bill Chumley (HAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHA ok, Chumley.) In a statement to GoUpstate, Chumley said:

If we could have manufacturers install filters that would be shipped to South Carolina, then anything that children have access on for pornography would be blocked. We felt like that would be another way to fight human trafficking. It’s where almost everybody has access to a computer now. It’s porn on demand. We have to start somewhere. … We’re bringing attention to it. We’re not being political. It’s an issue I’m pretty passionate about.

The new proposed bill would require that all computers sold in the state come with porn blocking software. If a manufacturer wanted to opt out of the requirement, or if a consumer wanted to have the adult filter removed on their device, they would have to pay $20 to the state.

Finally, Google has offered an extension for Chrome that replaces pictures of the short-fingered vulgarian with pictures of adorable kittehs. Google is finally giving the Internet its purpose: to showcase pictures of kittens in these troubling times.

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I love you, Internet.