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You Can't Buy Respect: The TCA Awards Vs. The Highest Paid Actors In Television. . .No Way, A LADY!

By Joanna Robinson | Miscellaneous | August 10, 2011 |

By Joanna Robinson | Miscellaneous | August 10, 2011 |


Right on the indignation of the Forbes List of the Highest Paid Film Actors, comes the fresh hell of the TV Guide Highest Paid TV Actors List. Just like the Forbes list, it’s chock-a-block full of middling talent/great talent who have settled for mediocrity. You can read more over at The Hollywood Reporter, but here are a few of the staggering figures to punch the highlights outta your hair:

  • The highest paid actor in television is this goober, right here. I like him more than some, but he’s still a goober. $700,000 per episode of “Two And A Half Men.”
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  • Mariska Hargitay earns $350,000 an episode of “Law & Order: Sports Utility Vehicle.” I hear she’s pretty confident in her sexuality.
  • Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor-Allen and Keifer “I Used To Make $400,000/episode as Jack Bauer” Sutherland will each be pulling in $125,000 an episode on their new shows.
  • And, finally, Simon “Blight On Humanity But Evil Genius When It Comes To Programming” Cowell will make $75 million per season of “The X Factor.” May it be cancelled early and often. (It won’t.)

In other boob tube news, the Television Critics Association hosted their annual Awards Ceremony this past weekend. In the past, the TCA Awards have been a sort of Alterna-Prom to the overstuffed pageantry of the Emmy Awards. Snubbed and over-looked shows like “Battlestar Galactica” (Program Of The Year, 2009) and “Sports Night” (Outstanding Achievement in Comedy, 1999) earn awards and Pajiba darlings (“The Wire,” “Veronica Mars,” etc.) at least get nominated. That’s not to say the TCA always makes the best choices. (I’m looking at your “Big Bang Theory” and “Glee” awards, TCA, and I’m not gleeful. Not in the slightest.) But as TCA member Thomas Lewis of the LAist pointed out, there were perhaps some more disappointments than usual this year. Or maybe I’m just sore that “Terriers” didn’t win anything…again.

I will admit to loving the streamlined and genderless categories of the TCA Awards, and you can’t argue with their pick for Program of The Year. NO YOU CANNOT. JUST TRY IT. I also love that sometimes there’s a tie, as was the case this year with “Individual Achievement in Comedy.” Here are the 2011 TCA Award nominees. Their winner in bold, my pick in italics. Oh you know you care about my opinion, don’t lie to yourself.

Individual Achievement in Drama:
Steve Buscemi (“Boardwalk Empire,” HBO)
Peter Dinklage (“Game of Thrones,” HBO)
Jon Hamm (“Mad Men,” AMC)
Julianna Margulies (“The Good Wife,” CBS)
Margo Martindale (“Justified”, FX)
Timothy Olyphant (“Justified,” FX)

Individual Achievement in Comedy
Ty Burrell (“Modern Family,” ABC)
Louis C.K. (“Louie,” FX)
Nick Offerman (“Parks and Recreation,” NBC)
Amy Poehler (“Parks and Recreation,” NBC)
Danny Pudi (“Community,” NBC)
Jon Stewart (“The Daily Show,” Comedy Central)

Outstanding Achievement in News and Information
“If God Is Willing and Da Creek Don’t Rise” (HBO)
“Restrepo” (National Geographic Channel)
“60 Minutes” (CBS)
“The Rachel Maddow Show” (MSNBC)
“30 for 30″ (ESPN)

Outstanding Achievement in Reality Programming
“Amazing Race” (CBS)
“Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations” (Travel Channel)
“Survivor” (CBS)
“The Voice” (NBC) (Don’t you dare judge me.)
“Top Chef: All Stars” (Bravo)

Outstanding Achievement in Youth Programming
“A Child’s Garden of Poetry” (HBO)
“iCarly” (Nickelodeon)
“Nick News with Linda Ellerbee” (Nickelodeon)
“R.L. Stine’s The Haunting Hour” (The Hub)
“Sesame Street” (PBS)
“Yo Gabba Gabba” (Nick Jr.)

Outstanding New Program
“Boardwalk Empire” (HBO)
“Game of Thrones” (HBO)
“Terriers” (FX)
“The Killing” (AMC)
“Walking Dead” (AMC)

Outstanding Achievement in Movies, Miniseries and Specials
“Cinema Verite” (HBO)
“Downton Abbey: Masterpiece” (PBS)
“Mildred Pierce” (HBO)
“Sherlock: Masterpiece” (PBS)
“Too Big to Fail” (HBO)

Outstanding Achievement in Drama
“Friday Night Lights” (DirecTV/NBC)
“Game of Thrones” (HBO)
“Justified” (FX)
“Mad Men” (AMC)
“The Good Wife” (CBS)

Outstanding Achievement in Comedy
“Community” (NBC)
“Louie” (FX)
“Modern Family” (ABC)
“Parks and Recreation” (NBC)
“Raising Hope” (FOX)

Career Achievement Award
Steven Bochco
Dick Ebersol
Cloris Leachman
David Letterman
William Shatner
Oprah Winfrey (I mean, you have to respect what she’s accomplished, even if you don’t enjoy her.)

Heritage Award
“All in the Family”
“Freaks and Geeks”
“The Dick Van Dyke Show” (I do love you, Rob Petrie)
“Twin Peaks”

Program of the Year
“Boardwalk Empire” (HBO)
“Friday Night Lights” (DirecTV/NBC)
“Game of Thrones” (HBO)
“Justified” (FX)
“Parks and Recreation” (NBC)

CLEAR EYES, FULL HEARTS, FINALLY DIDN’T LOSE!
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Joanna Robinson is mumbling “Texas Forever.” She hopes you’ll join her.