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Wu-Tang Clan Vs. Woof-Tang Clan: The Only Battle That Matters

By Tori Preston | Miscellaneous | November 22, 2017 |

By Tori Preston | Miscellaneous | November 22, 2017 |

Forget the tax plan and the FCC fuckery and the various scumbags in our newsfeeds, and get ready to pick sides in an issue that actually matters: a trademark dispute. The New York Daily News reports that RZA of the Wu-Tang Clan filed an opposition suit against a Brooklyn-based dog walking company called — yup, you guessed it — “Woof-Tang Clan.”

Back in June the Woof-Tang Clan (“The Illest Dogs In NYC”, natch) filed a trademark application, which these new court papers claim is in violation of registrations already held by the Wu-Tang Clan. As the suit points out, the name and logo have been “unmistakably associated” with RZA’s hip hop outfit for over 20 years. And I’m sure it’s a total coincidence that that t-shirts sporting dog-ified album covers, like one riffing on Old Dirty Bastard’s solo album “Return to the 36 Chambers,” have now been pulled from Woof-Tang’s website.

Look, from a legal standpoint it isn’t much of a battle. The Wu-Tang Clan is obviously in the right here. Besides:


But in the defense of Woof-Tang Clan’s founder Marty Cuatchon, it sounds like a case of taking his fandom a step too far. What may have started as a fun tribute to the band has become a money making venture on its own — and that’s the problem.

But the real victims here? All the rest of us. Because dammit, we could have had a badass crew of puppers to help get us through these dark times. But now our dreams of a real Woof-Tang Clan, only just discovered, have already been dashed.

Also — what about the poor dogs! How can you deny Tang-hood to this good boy?


Or this squad right here?


All I can say is RZA’s lucky that MY dog isn’t in the Woof-Tang Clan…

They call him 1 Chainz #hardcore

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Tori Preston is the managing editor of Pajiba. She tweets here. You can also listen to her weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.

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