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These Are Not The 'Star Wars' Dildos You Are Looking For

By Kristy Puchko | Miscellaneous | February 8, 2016 |

By Kristy Puchko | Miscellaneous | February 8, 2016 |

When Disney teamed with Star Wars there was a great disturbance in the Force as fans around the universe knew there would be a whole new world of merchandizing that would tempt them.

Some of them were incredibly cool, like a designer gown inspired by the instant gloriousness of Gwendoline Christie’s Chrome Trooper. Some of them were delicious, like those special edition ice creams. Some were infuriating because they forgot who the damn star of the new movie even was. Then there were these:


Indiana mom, Joni Jones spotted this Star Wars product at Target, and thought they looked more like sex toys than pool toys because of course she did! Look at these things!

H/T Instinct Magazine

Amused, Jones shared this amazing bit of movie merchandizing with the world.

Now we’re left to wonder 1) How did no one in the development meetings of these pool toys not say “Hang on a minute. These look like dildos.” 2) Having noticed that, how did no one make the call to swap random stormtrooper for pilot Poe Dameron? They’d have made a killing!

Kristy Puchko can’t even sometimes.