For backstory, last week I was working on what was to be a fun post about all the hilarious conspiracy theories that have surrounded Hillary Clinton her whole adult life. Obviously, by Tuesday night, I destroyed that post draft because nothing even semi-related to that topic would ever be “fun” ever again and in this new hellscape was the very vivid realization it never was, because to consider this nonsense amusing was to overestimate far too many people in this country.
Ahem. Anyway. (This will probably happen for a while.)
In my research of conspiracy theories, I came across one I hadn’t before. And that is that barcodes are the work of the devil.
Also, they cause cancer.
Buckle up, buttercups.
Basically, the belief is that all barcodes have 666 hidden in them, the number of the beast, purported to be marked on the body of the Anti-Christ who would bring about the end of days.
Spoiler before we start: they don’t. From Snopes:
Contrary to popular myth, all bar codes don’t include the number 666. This belief arose because the number six is represented by a pattern similar to that of the guard bars used to mark the beginning, middle, and end of every bar code. Since the guard bars always appear three times in a given bar code, people who mistakenly read them as sixes claimed that the pattern 6-6-6 was embedded in every bar code. However, if you look closely at the ‘6’ in a bar code, you will see that there is a wide white bar either to the left or the right of its pattern (depending upon where within the bar code the number is positioned), which is not the case with the guard bars. The only numbers on the bar code which are scanned are those shown in the conventional numerals underneath it.
But that’s just what they want us to believe, obviously. Because obviously no one has 666 marked on their body, that’s stupid. You know what isn’t stupid? A GLOBAL CONSPIRACY INVOLVING BARCODES.
Now, while I know of no one who has this mark on their body yet, it is becoming increasingly difficult to “buy or sell” anything without a barcode on it. Certain European currencies already have barcodes on every bill. Even this magazine now carries one because of the requirements of mass circulation. Could this be the so-called “Mark of the Beast?” Are we entering the so-called “end times?” It was time to get past all of the mystifying beliefs and find out what was really going on.
Yes. Let’s get past the nonsense AND GET TO THE HARD FACTS. Like how the inventor of the UPC code, George Joseph Laurer, has six letters in all three of his names. THINK ABOUT IT, SHEEPLE.
The writer of this article claims to have been researching cancer in a friend of his, noting “a growing cancer process in Jim’s aura” that they just couldn’t get rid of. Now, my friends and lovelies, if you believe in auras and sage burning and all that, that is your journey, you go forth and rub crystals under your armpits, you do you. But I feel like we can agree that cancer probably can’t be cured via one’s aura, and that barcodes probably don’t cause cancer.
But that’s apparently where we’re wrong.
The BARCODE itself is the problem. Like other geometric designs, each barcode has a radionic signature. You can think of it as a subtle energy antenna. Unfortunately, the barcodes are designed to encode product information without regard to this radionic effect. Due to this disregard, the radionic effects of barcodes are random. (This is, of course, if we disregard the conspiracy theories.) I use the term random here in the sense that they are not designed specifically to enhance health. In addition to this, the barcode functions quite STRONGLY as a random radionic tuning, and in large doses, the toxic effects of this disruption can become quite noticeable.
The radionic effects of the barcodes are activated by MOVING LIGHT. Laser scanning of the barcode will activate its bioenergetic toxicity. A simple flashlight will do the same thing to a lesser degree. The sun going up and down through the window will also activate the barcodes on products in your kitchen. Fluorescent lights, which actually flash at 120 times per second, activate them quite strongly. Simply moving the barcode through space, back and forth, perpendicular to the direction of the lines, also energizes it Dr. Quinton had unlocked the secret.
Here is what I now believe. The toxic radionic effects of the barcodes imbed in, and energize, the Light Ether. It is possible to stop 98% of the NEW activations by placing black tape over the barcode. However, simply removing the barcode from the product packaging or placing black tape over it does not eliminate the etherically imbedded radionic toxicity. Because the radionic toxicity exists in the Light Ether, it penetrates the packaging and imbeds in the product inside. This is true of FOODS, VITAMINS, and everything else. Most of us have been EATING radionic barcode toxicity as a part of our steady diet for years. Even products that don’t have barcodes on them can be affected if they were shipped to you by UPS, or any other shipper that uses barcodes for tracking purposes. As I said before, the implications are staggering. Everyone is affected to one degree or another.
FYI, radionics is a made up thing, so, like, we’re good. But if you’re still concerned, you can order special stickers that “not only prevents future activations of the barcode, but it neutralizes the toxic radionic imprint that has penetrated the packaging.”