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The Pajiba Academy Award Telecast Quiz and Contest -- Win a Date with C. Rob!

By C. Robert Dimitri | Miscellaneous | February 26, 2011 |

By C. Robert Dimitri | Miscellaneous | February 26, 2011 |


Greetings, all! I’ve put together what I hope you will find to be a fun quiz. We’re doing this the low-tech way. Leave your answers in the comments section, and I’ll score them. (If a ludicrous number of people participate, I request that you be extremely patient.)

What’s the prize? Your choice between an Oscar-winning DVD (title to be determined) or — should you be in the LA area anytime in the near future — my treating you to one of the guided tours of the Kodak Theatre, home of the Oscars. (As many times as I’ve gone past Hollywood and Highland since living in Los Angeles, it would give me an excuse finally to check it out.) Of course, the real prize in these parts is bragging rights, isn’t it?

If you have inside knowledge of the Oscar ceremony you are ineligible to compete, unless your name is James Franco or Anne Hathaway, in which case I’ll be happy to hang out with you for an afternoon at the Kodak.

1. Oscar ceremony history would imply that it’s a given that hosts James Franco and Anne Hathaway will be singing and dancing. Goofy “kids” that they are (compared to the usual hosting crowd and the Academy at large), they probably have some particularly high-energy performance in store for us. They also represent a very rare male-female dynamic (at least in recent history) in Oscar hosting. Simple question: Will Franco and Hathaway kiss at any point during their hosting duties? A peck on the cheek counts.

A) YES
B) NO

2. True or false: Someone at some point during the ceremony will mention James Franco’s appearances on General Hospital. (James Franco himself does count as “someone.” So does the announcer.)

A) TRUE
B) FALSE

3. True of false: Someone at some point during the ceremony will allude to Anne Hathaway’s role in The Princess Diaries.

A) TRUE
B) FALSE

4. Bad news. In this quiz, the only Oscar wins you’ll be predicting are the ones for which the “experts” are extremely divided on projecting the winner. You will receive no easy credit by answering your precious Darcy! Here’s your first one: Which movie takes Best Art Direction?

A) Alice In Wonderland
B) Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows Part 1
C) Inception
D) The King’s Speech
E) True Grit

5. And here’s another in that tricky battle between the worlds of Lewis Carroll and King George VI. What wins Best Costume Design?

A) Alice In Wonderland
B) I Am Love
C) The King’s Speech
D) The Tempest
E) True Grit

6. I had a clever question about potential presenters worked out, and then I discovered that the Academy has already released the list of most of the presenters online. Here’s an alternate: Assuming Francis Ford Coppola receives special recognition during this year’s ceremony for the Irving G. Thalberg award, who will have the honor of presenting it to him, perhaps with halcyon tales of Godfather glory or tales from that vibrant age of film, the 1970s? (If there isn’t a spot in the ceremony for this, we’ll throw the question out.)

A) Sofia Coppola
B) Al Pacino
C) George Lucas
D) Martin Sheen
E) Someone else - or multiple presenters

7. True or false: At least one award recipient will acknowledge protesters in the Middle East during an acceptance speech. (For the purposes of this question, a mention outside an acceptance speech does not count.)

A) TRUE
B) FALSE

8. I’m setting the predicted number of times we hear Mark Zuckerberg’s name in any context (including acceptance speeches) throughout the ceremony at four and a half. Movie clips do not count. Over or under?

A) OVER
B) UNDER

9. Facebook isn’t the only social network on the Internet, and the Academy desperately wants to remain relevant and hip. I’m also setting the predicted number of times we hear the word “tweet” (or “tweeted,” “tweeting,” etc. - but because I’m in an arbitrary mood, NOT “Twitter”) during the ceremony at four and a half. Over or under?

A) OVER
B) UNDER

10. Perhaps subtracting those hip-points that “tweet” would give them, the Academy publicly denied Banksy’s request to attend the ceremony incognito, but he is a sneaky guy. I’m holding out hope that we are in for a surprise to liven up the proceedings.
True of false: Banksy — or someone claiming to be Banksy who is not revealed otherwise before the ceremony ends — will make an appearance (disguised or not) either on the stage or in some sort of attention-drawing gesture in the audience during the ceremony. (If the camera cuts to him seated in the audience with a bag over his head, it would count for the purposes of this question.)

A) TRUE
B) FALSE

11. Whether or not Banksy appears, a film still wins Best Documentary Feature. Which will it be?

A) Exit through the Gift Shop
B) Gasland
C) Inside Job
D) Restrepo
E) Waste Land

12. Best Documentary Short deserves some love too. Good luck calling this one correctly …

A) Killing In The Name
B) Poster Girl
C) Strangers No More
D) Sun Come Up
E) The Warriors of Qiugang

13. True or false: at least TWO award winners will at some point during an acceptance speech apologize for forgetting someone or acknowledge that he or she is doing so.

A) TRUE
B) FALSE

14. Hooray for the Oscars’ acknowledgment of other countries and films that originate from them! What’s the Best Foreign Language Film?

A) Biutiful (Mexico)
B) Dogtooth (Greece)
C) In A Better World (Denmark)
D) Incendies (Canada)
E) Outside The Law (Algeria)

15. Best Live Action Short Film is not any easier to guess. Give it a try …

A) The Confession
B) The Crush
C) God Of Love
D) Na Wewe
E) Wish 143

16. The terrible “injustice” and “robbery” of Oscar nominations and wins never fails to make me roll my eyes, but I’ll make an exception in acknowledging what should have won the Best Score for 1980, when the greatest film score ever composed struck out. (And, no, I don’t care that John Williams won several times in the surrounding years.) I digress. Which film takes the Best Original Music Score prize this time? (With all sorts of bias, go Trent!)

A) How To Train Your Dragon
B) Inception
C) The King’s Speech
D) 127 Hours
E) The Social Network

17. Oh, Natalie Portman! If only we could all channel our inner Black Swan as you did! Here’s an over/under for Natalie’s Best Actress acceptance speech: 100 seconds. (Please be lenient and try not to play too many winners off the stage, orchestra. We’re settled in and don’t mind five or ten extra minutes on the couch for the sake of someone’s big moment.) What do you say?

A) OVER
B) UNDER
C) Natalie? Annette (or Jennifer or Nicole or Michelle) has this thing locked up!

18. Best Animated Feature seems a foregone conclusion, but Best Animated Short Film could be a contest. Which one takes the prize?

A) Day & Night
B) The Gruffalo
C) Let’s Pollute
D) The Lost Thing
E) Madagascar, carnet de voyage

19. It’s a dream…within a dream…within a dream…within a dream…within a dream? For all you Inception fans, at least a couple Oscars are expected to validate your Christopher Nolan worship and the big action mind-bender of the summer of 2010. I’ll set the over/under for Inception Oscars at two and a half.

A) OVER
B) UNDER

20. Who will join the celebrated club that is Best Director?

A) Tom Hooper - this year’s DGA honoree
B) David Fincher - Assistant Cameraman for Return of the Jedi
C) one of those other three nominees (and if it’s those versatile Coen brothers, they would keep the club at its current level of exclusivity for another year)

21. What will win Best Picture?

A) The King’s Speech — That rousing tale of a king that overcame his stutter.
B) The Social Network — That emotionally detached tale of a billionaire and how he enabled you to “poke” your friends and conveniently look at their photos.
C) one of the other eight nominees

22. The tried and true tiebreaker: to the nearest minute, how long will this broadcast monstrosity run?

If this thing is still tied after that, we go to a random drawing. Good luck, movie fans!

C. Robert Dimitri does not care about Oscar snubs, who wins, and who loses. He especially does not care about “best dressed,” “worst dressed,” and all the fashion hubbub. However, he does enjoy the ceremony and loves the film dialogue that the Academy Awards spawn this time of year.

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