Sorry Spring Breakers, The State Department Thinks You're Too Ugly to Get Hit On Abroad

By Vivian Kane | Miscellaneous | March 31, 2016 |

By Vivian Kane | Miscellaneous | March 31, 2016 |

For college students across the US, this week is Spring Break. And that only means one thing.

But for the US State Department, Spring Break means something different: scaring the crap out of everyone traveling abroad. Their Twitter account has been sending out messages all week with the hashtag #SpringBreakingBadly. They’ve been warning students to look out for unlicensed taxis, not accept suitcases lined with cocaine, and possibly most importantly, be vigilant in bars, lest you get roofied or robbed.

That’s right, unless you’re a solid 10, no one could possibly be interested in conversation or romance. Anyone who is approaching you is just interested in you buying their drinks or giving them your wallet. Which you’ll be happy to do, right? Because you’re so very appreciative of the attention, seeing as you walk around all day not being Scarlett Johansson? Are you a 10? Then sit back and relax because literally nothing bad could possibly happen to you, you lucky hottie, permanently immune to all harm.

Naturally, people have a lot of questions.

Hey @TravelGov, just sent you an email — my Facebook is https://t.co/g0Ms6ulud9, can you rate me on a scale from 1-10? It's for a story.

— Jack Crosbie (@jscros) March 30, 2016

.@TravelGov what about being "hot in Cleveland," is that real?

— B.J. Novak (@bjnovak) March 30, 2016

@TimHerrera @TravelGov since when does the State Department neg its own citizens?

— caitlin cruz (@caitlinrcruz) March 30, 2016

@TravelGov what should I do if I am a 10?

— Josh Barro (@jbarro) March 30, 2016

I'm a 6.2 in the US but due to metric conversion I actually AM a 10 abroad

— Max Read (@max_read) March 30, 2016

The original tweet has been deleted and an apology put up, but luckily, because this is the internet, a parody account popped up almost immediately, just in case you’re looking for more advice on how to be unattractive (Or attractive! 10s, they’ve got you covered, too.) abroad.

ALERT TO ALL U.S. "10"s: DON'T TRAVEL TO SWITZERLAND
The lighting there is poor. You will downgrade to 8's, leaving you vulnerable to scams.

— Travel Gov (@Travel_Gov) March 31, 2016

if you were a "10" the last time you traveled but more than five years have elapsed please contact the State Department before venturing out

— Travel Gov (@Travel_Gov) March 31, 2016

before you leave, check! have you remembered to pack your
-passport
-travel documents
-oppressive conventional standards of beauty

— Travel Gov (@Travel_Gov) March 30, 2016

portable attractiveness scale if you are not near a trusted state department official but fear #springbreakingbadly pic.twitter.com/uVawUxmRVU

— Travel Gov (@Travel_Gov) March 30, 2016

Thanks a million, State Department. It’s good to know you’ve always got my hideous back.

Via The Guardian.