Serious Question: Is This Outfit Hot Or Not?
Look, I don’t pretend to be a fashionista. My greatest joy is finding expensive jeans at thrift stores for cheap. There was a time in my life when I thought “Versace” was just a weird picture spread they’d add to random pages in Vogue magazine… which is something I announced, awkwardly and loudly, inside an actual Versace store on a school trip to Italy.
(Seriously though, have you ever walked into a Versace? They don’t actually sell things. I’m still not convinced they aren’t a smoke screen for an artsy fartsy ad agency.)
Anyway, my point is I don’t have my finger on the pulse of fashion. Which is why I am semi-obsessed with Blake Lively’s Instagram. Somehow she made it into the algorithm on my “explore” tab in the app, and let me tell you — that woman is MADE for clothes. I can’t think of the last movie I saw her in, but I can tell you all about her red carpet looks.
This week she did a day of press for her new movie, All I See Is You. Or I think that’s what she was doing? Whatever her reasons, she spent a day flitting around NYC in a half dozen different outfits, and talking about her costume changes on social media. Most of the looks were… not good. Some were not good in that way that’s like, “I don’t aspire to that, but ok.” And others were like, “That is objectively awful and if I find out it’s trendy in any way I’m moving to a fucking cave.” There was houndstooth and statement boots and something that was INCREDIBLY YELLOW. And then there was this ensemble right here:
And I guess what I’m asking is… is that gorgeous or what? Look at it again. Scroll through — there are multiple photos, with close-ups of the elements.
Like, I don’t normally get all HOLD THE PHONE about a picture of a random celeb garbed in clothes I can’t afford, but holy shit. Someday in my life I wanna dress like Hot Lady Banker Sherlock On A Mission. I even love the boots, and I don’t normally like witchy combat boots with heels, or even leather that’s too glossy.
I want to know where I can get an overcoat I can wear like a cape that is also made of the exact same fabric and a men’s style suit that’s cut to fit my figure.
I want a satchel, goddamnit.
I need to wear more ties in my life.
So um, Blake Lively? Thanks for putting on a shit-ton of clothes this week and coming up with one thing I can add to my totally non-existent vision board. You keep doing you. In power suits.