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RIP Randy Savage: Elegy Written On The Top Turnbuckle

By Dan Saipher | Miscellaneous | May 23, 2011 |

By Dan Saipher | Miscellaneous | May 23, 2011 |

When the ring bell tolls no longer,
And 3-counts fail to crown new champions,
Those legacies that endure far stronger
Are of personalities bright as distant suns.

The lasting fables of our squared circle
In spotlights, flares, fireworks, and beating drums
Belong not to boundless leapers or dreamers vernal
But weary warriors, they to time and injury succumb.

From that quantity of blood, bile, and broken bones
Left adorning small venue canvas mats,
Is a quality of effort, paid dues with named unknowns
In backwater towns and untelevised combats.

Molded and refined in the minor-league trots
Our crusader, crazed-eye hero,
Took his lumps, bumps, and violent spots
As “The Genius”, “The Spider”, nee Randall Poffo.

In the same year as my birth
The ‘85 Wrestling Classic
Came an elemental cosmic burst,
Of a savant, a beastly Savage with ferocity graphic.

His coming marked the synergy of the old and of the new;
Escorted by woman of elegance grace
Yet adorned in colors and garb of a fashion ingénue
Charging thunder in the ring, a laser-show chariot race.

The Macho Man played villain,
Endeavored to tame The Dragon,
Crushed Steamboat’s larynx to accomplish his mission,
But at Wrestlemania III they both played the craftsmen.

In-ring acumen now a proven product,
Macho Man used banter and superior verbiage
To further the image he did carefully construct,
Baffled Mean Gene with his philosophical knowledge.

He expanded the retinue of the Federation,
Making “Intercontinental Champ” worthy
Of historic praise and distinction,
All before the Mega Powers took to their journey.

Behind the veil of sports entertainment,
Dedicated to she that matched his skyward dream.
Summerslam 1991, a public bond and blessed event,
Adjoined to Miss Elizabeth, noteworthy of past loves supreme.

And though time proved to be most unkind,
And though this marriage was not to be eternal,
Their partnership pressed on, we the blind
Entrusted to enjoy the teevee screens’ drama scriptural.

The years pressed on,
And Sir Savage found opportunity
His presence as pitch man sine qua non
To the Slim Jim company.

He dared us to be bold and manly as he,
Though laughable the thought to match his record,
We sought to heed his gravelly decree;
Snap into this jerky and go with his greatness forward.

One last view in his twilight,
A big screen cameo for the 21st century,
Grapple with the Spider-Man and hear the sound bite
Here he comes, for “BONESAW IS READY”!

Tragedy comes for all,
All lights go extinguished,
But those brazen few who hear the call
Of greatness are never diminished

So long as the lachrymose masses
Fiercely trumpet his name,
Macho Man Randy Savage passes,
But we shall never lose sight of his fame.

Dan Saipher has delivered many a flying elbow drop to many a challenger, and will do so with a tear-eyed countenance forever more.

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