New TV week ends for me tonight, at least until all the mid-season replacement shows start to replace the shows that somehow failed to attract an audience after all of three episodes, which is a little sad. It’s all downhill from here, you know? Most of these shows will never get better than the anticipation you had leading up to their return, or their premiere. It’s a sad realization, and the high of this week and all the shiny new shows you get to watch will soon fade to jaded and bitter disappointment as they fail to live up to your expectations and you’ll either keep watching and be that person who keeps defending their crappy show to their friends (“OK, yeah, the dialogue does suck but the story line is interesting! Sometimes!”) or stop watching. Me? I tend to find a middle ground where I keep watching but don’t bother defending the shows. Yes, I watch bad TV, and I’m comfortable with that. Here’s your Thursday night TV:
7:30pm: “Thursday Night College Football: Miami at Pittsburgh” on ESPN. WOOOOOO! Go, Canes!
8:00pm: “The Big Bang Theory” on CBS. Fourth season premiere.
“Bones” on Fox. Sixth season premiere.
“Community” on NBC. Second season premiere.
“Extreme Cuisine with Jeff Corwin” on Food Network. Second season finale.
“My Generation” on ABC. Series premiere. What’s the likelihood that any of these shows that have this concept of speaking for a generation are actually written by people of that generation? I know most of the shows about my actual generation feel like they’re written by older people who don’t get the crazy lingo these kids are using these days with their texting and The Facebook. It always bugs a little.
“The Universe” on History
“The Vampire Diaries” on The CW
8:30pm: “30 Rock” on NBC. Fifth season premiere.
“Bleep My Dad Says” on CBS. Series premiere. Tune in to watch something that was funny for about 20 minutes when you first discovered it die a slow and tortured death. Also, can we get a petition going for a watershed hour like they have in the UK so we can just put this on after 10pm or whatever and call it “Shit My Dad Says” for real? Won’t make the show any better, but it’ll make it less annoying.
9:00pm: “CSI: Colonel Sanders Original” on CBS. Eleventh season premiere.
“Destination Truth” on SyFy
“America’s Best: Sweets” on Food Network
“Fringe” on Fox. Third season premiere.
“Grey’s Anatomy” on ABC. Seventh season premiere. You know how I mentioned I watch bad television? This is one of those shows I put in that category. Yup.
“Nikita” on The CW
“The Office” on NBC. Seventh season premiere.
“Project Runway” on Lifetime
“The Real Housewives of DC” on Bravo
9:30pm: “Outsourced” on NBC. Series premiere.
10:00pm: “Ace of Cakes” on Food Network
“The Apprentice” on NBC
“BBQ Pit Masters” on TLC. Second season finale.
“Beast Legends” on SyFy. They’re tackling “Megajaws” this week. I didn’t realize any culture had a legend of the mythical Megajaws.
“Come Dine With Me” on BBCA
“It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” on FX
“Jersey Shore” on MTV
“The Mentalist” on CBS. Third season premiere.
“Stan Lee’s Superhumans” on History
“Private Practice” on ABC. Fourth season premiere.
10:30pm: “The League” on FX
“On the Road with Austin and Santino” on Lifetime
Late Night Listings
“The Late Show with David Letterman” on CBS featuring James Franco, Sofia Vergara, and Shakira
“The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” on NBC featuring Jimmy Smits, Jackie Evancho, and Brian Wilson
“Jimmy Kimmel Live” on ABC featuring Zach Galifianakis, Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, and Trombone Shorty
“The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson” on CBS featuring Jon Hamm, Jonathan Ames, and Bettye LaVette
“Late Night with Jimmy Fallon” on NBC featuring Amy Poehler, Rashida Jones, and Pavement
“Last Call with Carson Daly” on NBC featuring Ron Perlman, Robert Hall, and Janelle Monae
“The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” on Comedy Central featuring His Majesty King Abdullah II
“The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central featuring Oscar Goodman
Intern Rusty is a Masters student at the University of Miami. You can learn more about her at Rusty’s Ventures.