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I Blame Canada. The Dionne Quintuplets Started This Trend.

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | August 30, 2010 |

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | August 30, 2010 |

Don’t you hate how, after you move, you spend about the next week and a half tripping over the stuff you don’t have or that’s just different? I don’t have a physical guide for my TV channels and for reasons of it’s own (probably related to being dropped in a puddle during the move) my TV won’t show me the very outside edges of the screen, so when I watch the guide channel I can’t see the first digit of the channel number and have to guess based on where it is in relation to channels I know. I’m not doing so well at that, which is sort of pathetic. And then there are just the times when nothing’s on so I end up watching the guide channel for about half an hour like it’s some sort of modern lava lamp. In the midst of all the other crap I’m trying to get taken care of, it’s a little maddening that television, which is supposed to be relaxing, is one of the things I’m still trying to figure out. Here’s tonight’s television, which will have to compete with the allure of the guide channel for my time:

8:00pm: “Bachelor Pad” on ABC

“The Secret Life of the American Teenager” on ABC Family

9:00pm: “The Best Thing I Ever Ate” on Food Network

“The Closer” on TNT. Kyra Sedgewick won an Emmy for this show last night and while I think Ms.Sedgewick seems like an absolutely lovely person, no. Her accent on this show is so ridiculously overwrought and distracting. I don’t watch enough of the show to say if the “character development” of having the character be from the South is worth the price of that accent but I’m gonna go ahead and say probably not.

“History Detectives: WB Cartoons, Galvez Papers, Mussolini Dagger” on PBS

“Huge” on ABC Family. First season finale.

“Kate Plus 8” on TLC

“Lie to Me” on Fox

“Money Hungry” on VH1. Shows like this make me wonder how much further down the rabbit hole of reality television we have to go; we went from shows cast with regular people, to shows about people who had previously been cast on other reality shows. How many shows do reality stars have to get (particularly blatantly scripted ones like “The Hills”) before they’re just really bad actors and the cycle has to start all over again?

“Rupaul’s Drag U” on Logo

“Top Gear” on BBCA

“WWE: Raw” on USA. 900th episode. Damn.

9:30pm: “Operation Repo” on TruTV

“Rob Drydek’s Fantasy Factory” on MTV

10:00pm: “Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations” on Travel. It’s a “Making of” episode, proceed at your own risk.

“My Mic Sounds Nice: A Truth About Women and Hip Hop” on BET. One hour special presentation.

“Dance Your Ass Off” on Oxygen. Second season finale.

“Dateline NBC” on NBC

“Diners, Drive Ins and Dives” on Food Network. Tenth season premiere.

“Fashion Police: The 2010 Primetime Emmy Awards” on E!. One hour special presentation. In case you didn’t get enough of people in fake tanner insulting designer clothes last night. Just visit Go Fug Yourself, it’s funnier and there’s far less Billy Bush to deal with.

“Hard Core Pawn” on TruTV

“Mystery Diagnosis” on Health

“Quints By Surprise” on TLC. Series premiere. Bleh.

“The Real Housewives of New Jersey: The Reunion Part 1” on Bravo.

“Rizzoli and Isles” on TNT

“Rob Drydek’s Fantasy Factory” on MTV

“Scream Queens” on VH1

“Shatner’s Aftermath” on Bio

“Weeds” on Showtime

“Dating in the Dark” on ABC

10:30pm: “The Big C” on Showtime

“Quints By Surprise” on TLC. So, I’m just curious, after you make the appointment at the fertility clinic do you give TLC a call, just in case? How do they find all these families?

“Warren the Ape” on MTV. First season finale.

Intern Rusty is a Masters student at the University of Miami. You can learn more about her at Rusty’s Ventures.

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Genevieve Burgess is a Features Contributor for Pajiba. You can follow Genevieve Burgess on Twitter.