Today it appears that the debt crisis has been sort of kind of averted though part of me wishes that we’d gotten a chance to see the legislation get a shark week crossover in the form of ‘if y’all don’t do your damn jobs instead of grand-standing to the media we’re going to toss you in this tank with a bunch of sharks’ kind of way. However since I’m not exactly qualified to discuss important political business (or sharks, really) that’s the last you’ll hear about that out of me. The bottom line is that we have another evening full of sharks and shark related programming on the Discovery channel that I hope all of you are able to enjoy. Because it’s awesome. And watching a Great White take down a seal in mid-air is a thing of beauty. Here’s your Tuesday night TV:
8:00pm: “Cupcake Wars” on Food Network
“Hell’s Kitchen” on Fox
“It’s Worth What?” on NBC
“Moby Dick” on Encore
“Live from Lincoln Center: Opening Night Mostly Mozart Festival” on PBS
“Pretty Little Liars” on ABC Family
“Wipeout” on ABC
9:00pm: “19 Kids and Counting” on TLC. Fifth season summer finale.
“America’s Got Talent” on NBC
“Billy the Exterminator” on A&E. Fourth season premiere.
“Killer Sharks” on Discovery. According to “Rogue Sharks” of last night’s Shark Week programming, there may be sharks developing a taste for people (previously, it had been suspected that sharks only attacked humans because they mistook them for seals or out of self defense) which, I hate to say it, may be extremely evolutionarily intelligent. We’re soft, can’t swim particularly well, and regularly gather at the ocean. Don’t some of you have beach vacations coming up? Have fun!
“Flipping Out” on Bravo
“Gordon Ramsay’s Great Escape” on BBCA. First season finale.
“Hardcore Pawn” on TruTV
“Masterchef” on Fox
“Memphis Beat” on TNT
“The Nine Lives of Chloe King” on ABC Family
“Take the Money and Run” on ABC. Series premiere. This is a show where there are three ‘teams’: The “criminals” who are given $100,000 to hide, the cops (actual police officers) who have 48 hours to find it, and interrogators who are a detective and a district attorney in their previous careers who are working to get the “criminals” to tell them where the money is. If the money isn’t found within 48 hours, the criminals get to keep it. If it is, the cops get to keep it. They rotate cities week to week. The New York Times has a review explaining why this is ABC’s attempt at helping to create a police state because of course they do.
“White Collar” on USA
10:00pm: “Born to Dance: Laurieann Gibson” on BET. Series premiere.
“Chopped” on Food Network
“Combat Hospital” on ABC
“Covert Affairs” on USA
“Hawthorne” on TNT
“The Little Couple” on TLC. Fourth season summer finale.
“Picker Sister” on Lifetime. Series premiere.
“POV: Steam of Life by Joonas Berghäll and Mika Hotakainen” on PBS
“Storage Hunters” on TruTV
“Teen Mom” on MTV
11:00pm: “Awkward” on MTV
Late Night Listings
“The Late Show with David Letterman” on CBS featuring Ricky Gervais, Cat Deeley, and Explosions in the Sky
“The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” on NBC featuring Katie Holmes, Novak Djokovic, and Mat Kearney
“Jimmy Kimmel Live” on ABC featuring Hank Azaria, Jim Sturgess, and the Lonely Forest
“The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson” on CBS featuring Kristen bell, Eddie Izzard, and Jean Reno
“Late Night with Jimmy Fallon” on NBC featuring Danny McBride, Dianna Agron, and Sergio Mendes
“The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” on Comedy Central featuring Jason Bateman
“The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central featuring Al Hunt
“Chelsea Lately” on E featuring Martha Plimpton, Joe Matarese, Sarah Colonna, and Ross Mathews
“Conan” on TBS featuring Shaquille O’Neal, Brian Posehn, and Seether
Intern Rusty has a Masters degree in Music Business and Entertainment Industry which makes her sound more successful than she really is. You can read more about her at Rusty’s Ventures.