Tonight we have the return of football (even if it’s only preseason football) and the months long passive aggressive comment war between the people who love football and the people who don’t care for it much but insist on informing us that they don’t care for it much EVERY SINGLE TIME it comes up. Listen, I get it. Some of you aren’t football people and that’s cool. We all have our preferences. Me? I hate mushrooms. And coconut. However, the football season is long and it only seems longer if you take every opportunity to remind us that you don’t like football, usually in a way that implies that it somehow makes you smarter or culturally superior. Unless you can figure out a really clever way to say it, in which case dive right in. I will enjoy wit over originality any day. Here’s your Thursday night TV:
8:00pm: “Monday Night Football: Preseason: Seattle at San Diego” on ESPN. I still haven’t figured out why they insist on calling this “Monday Night Football” when it is clearly not Monday night and it always bugs me. Also, there’s a Ravens/Eagles game tonight but that seems to only be on local channels. I was going to make a comment about the size of the respective fan bases, but I’m really having a hard time guessing which teams would be more popular nationwide.
“America’s Home Cooking” on PBS
“So You Think You Can Dance” on Fox
“Wipeout” on ABC
9:00pm: “Big Brother” on CBS
“Burn Notice” on USA
“Expedition Impossible” on ABC
“The First 48” on A&E
“Project Runway” on Lifetime
“Sweet Home Alabama” on CMT
10:00pm: “Ancient Aliens” on History
“Extreme Chef” on Food Network. First season finale.
“Futurama” on Comedy Central
“Jersey Shore” on MTV
“LA Ink” on TLC
“Rookie Blue” on ABC
“Suits” on USA
“Texas Women” on CMT
“Wilfred” on FX. I’ve watched some of this but I think the premise makes a better movie than TV show, because the longer the show goes on the more people are going to wonder why the dog appears as a person to whatever Elijah Wood’s character is named while appearing as a dog to everyone else. Unless they just don’t intend to bother answering the question, in which case I applaud them on their massive balls.
10:30pm: “Louie” on FX
“Russian Dolls” on Lifetime
“Ugly Americans” on Comedy Central
12:00am: “Children’s Hospital” on Adult Swim
Late Night Listings
“The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” on NBC featuring Sam Worthington, Bailee Madison, and The Game
“Late Night with Jimmy Fallon” on NBC featuring Emma Stone, Stephen Moyer, and Chef Fabio Viviani
“The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” on Comedy Central featuring Michael Wallis
“The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central featuring Gloria Steinem
“Chelsea Lately” on E featuring Trace Adkins, Josh Wolf, Chris Franjola, and Fortune Feimster
“Conan” on TBS featuring Denis Leary, Sheamus, and Keb Mo
Intern Rusty has a Masters degree in Music Business and Entertainment Industry which makes her sound more successful than she really is. You can read more about her at Rusty’s Ventures.