In the least surprising news of the year (and in a year that’s already seen the revelation that Schwarzenegger has an illegitimate kid and that Donald Trump doesn’t ACTUALLY intend to run for president, that’s saying something) the Rapture didn’t happen yesterday. I don’t know anyone who genuinely believed it would happen so no one I know is disappointed or betrayed or anything like that. (Also, is it just me or is it massively presumptuous to believe that you as a person are holy enough to be taken in the Rapture? Wouldn’t that count as being overly prideful and disqualify you from being Rapture-worthy? Thoughts for another day.) Now we can all relax until some new cultural zeitgeist grabs our attention. Here’s your Sunday night TV:
7:00pm: “60 Minutes” on CBS
“America’s Funniest Home Videos” on ABC. 21st season finale.
“Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom” on Animal Planet. Ninth season finale.
7:30pm: “American Dad” on Fox. Sixth season finale.
8:00pm: “60 Minutes” on CBS. New episode at a special time. Big night at the nursing home, Back to back “60 Minutes!” I wonder if they got Andy Rooney to stay awake via an amphetamine or mild electric jolts to his chair.
“The 2011 Billboard Music Awards” on ABC
“Bert the Conquerer” on Travel
“When Animals Bite Back” on Discovery
“Food Network Challenge: Wild West Chocolate” on Food Network. 12th season finale.
“Jerseylicious” on Style
“Minute to Win It” on NBC
“Mob Wives” on VH1
“Bears of the Last Frontier” on PBS
“Season 25: Oprah Behind the Scenes” on OWN
“The Simpsons” on Fox. 22nd season finale.
8:30pm: “Bob’s Burgers” on Fox. First season finale.
“NBA Playoffs: Miami at Chicago, Game 3” on TNT
9:00pm: “The Apprentice” on NBC. 11th season finale.
“Army Wives” on Lifetime
“Audrina” on VH1
“Best in Smoke” on Food Network
“Family Guy” on Fox. One hour ninth season finale. I think it’s another one of their “Star Wars” themed episodes, so if that’s your thing than I’m happy for you. Really.
“Game of Thrones” on HBO
“Hogs Gone Wild” on Discovery
“Jesse Stone: Innocents Lost” on CBS. Original Telefilm. Seventh in the series of television movies based off the popular (?) book series starring Tom Selleck. Man, really is a big night at the nursing home. CBS knows their audience.
“Law and Order: Criminal Intent” on USA
“Sister Wives” on TLC
9:30pm: “Saddle Ranch” on VH1
10:00pm: “Amazing Wedding Cakes” on WE
“The Borgias” on Showtime. First season finale.
“Breakout Kings” on A&E
“Coming Home” on Lifetime
“Tornado Rampage 2011” on Discovery
“In Plain Sight” on USA
“Khloe and Lamar” on E
“The Killing” on AMC
“The Real Houswives of Orange County” on Bravo
“Strange Sex” on TLC. Second season finale.
“Treme” on HBO
“Why Not? With Shania Twain” on OWN
10:30pm: “The Dance Scene” on E
Intern Rusty has a Masters degree in Music Business and Entertainment Industry. If you know someone who may be interested in that specialty, please email her.