Pajiba After Dark: What Does Washed Up Look Like?
Tonight features the reality shows of Sinbad, Toni Braxton and Family, and Toya who is… famous for apparently one single from 2001. I’m beginning to question the qualifications for having your own reality series, seems like back in the day you had to at least pop out an extraordinary number of babies to get a camera crew to follow your every movement. Now not having any sort of notable career for the last decade seems to be the new benchmark, unless you’re in Miami when that’s just a reason to run for Mayor. (Seriously.) I’m not mad at these people for getting their own shows, good on them for managing to get a paycheck on a name that hasn’t been news in years, I’m just wondering what audience is like “You know what I really want to see? A show about Sinbad’s family. That would be just perfect.” If you are that person please let me know because I have so many questions I’d like to ask you. Here’s your Tuesday night TV:
8:00pm: “The Biggest Loser” on NBC
“Glee” on Fox. Prom episode! Wait, what year are most of these kids? Are Finn, Quinn, Lauren, Puck et al seniors? Is Rachel? I totally thought they were juniors at best. So is this the Junior Prom? Is anyone even paying a damn bit of attention to shit like that anymore? No? That’s what I thought.
“NCIS: Swan Song” on CBS
“One Tree Hill” on The CW
“Black in Latin America: Mexico and Peru” on PBS
“NBA Playoffs: Atlanta at Chicago, Game 5” on TNT
“NHL Playoffs: San Jose at Detroit, Game 6” on Versus
9:00pm: “16 and Pregnant” on MTV
“Braxton Family Values” on WE
“Dancing With The Stars” on ABC
“Deadliest Catch” on Discovery
“Hardcore Pawn” on TruTV
“Hellcats” on The CW
“NCIS: Los Angeles” on CBS
“Only in America With Larry the Cable Guy” on History
“Becoming Chaz” on OWN
“Raising Hope” on Fox
9:30pm: “Traffic Light” on Fox
10:00pm: “Chopped” on Food Network
“The Good Wife” on CBS
“How the States Got Their Shapes” on History
“Independent Lens: Bhutto” on PBS
“Pregnant in Heels” on Bravo. I know this show is about like, rich fancy ladies who happen to be pregnant but all I can think is that if I were a rich fancy lady who was pregnant I could afford some REALLY COMFY FLATS while my center of gravity was shifting every day and my feet were swelling. Or a team of fetching young men to carry me around on a specially designed litter featuring a mini-fridge containing only milkshakes. I’m not sure if I’m wrong or if the fancy ladies are.
“Sinbad: It’s Just Family” on WE
“Swamp Brothers” on Discovery. Series premiere.
“Toya: A Family Affair” on BET
“The Voice” on NBC. New time slot.
“Worst. Prom. Ever” on MTV. Original telefilm. Unless this is a reworking of Carrie, there’s no way that’s true.
“Body of Proof” on ABC
10:30pm: “Sports Show with Norm MacDonald” on Comedy Central
Late Night Listings
“The Late Show with David Letterman” on CBS featuring Mark Harmon, Chris Morgan, and Hugo
“The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” on NBC featuring Julie Scardina, Ginnifer Goodwin, and Def Leppard
“Jimmy Kimmel Live” on ABC featuring Nathan Fillion, the latest “Dancing With the Stars” castoff, and Calle 13
“The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson” on CBS featuring Kenneth Branagh and Edward Conlon
“Late Night Jimmy Fallon” on NBC featuring Keira Knightley, John McEnroe, and Chris Cornell
“Last Call with Carson Daly” on NBC featuring Frenchie Davis, Lost in the Trees, and the Knux
“The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” on Comedy Central featuring Will Ferrell
“The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central featuring Geoffrey Rush
“Chelsea Lately” on E featuring Paul Bettany, Jeff Wild, Chris Franjola, and Sarah Colonna
“Conan” on TBS featuring Zach Braff, Judd Apatow, and Al Madrigal
Intern Rusty is a Masters student at the University of Miami. You can learn more about her at Rusty’s Ventures