He's Going to Call Me Uncultured Swine Again, I Just Know It
Baseball season has started again, which means I will try fruitlessly to watch baseball on television again at some point this summer, remember that I’ve only ever liked baseball when I’ve been at a live game and give up. Whereas football only becomes more confusing when you go to an actual game (ball is harder to see, everything looks smaller and faster, etc.) baseball actually gets more interesting live because more things seem to be happening as opposed to a bunch of guys hanging out in a field waiting for something to happen. And before you start lecturing me on the history of the sport and how I was obviously raised by French wolves who never instilled in me the proper appreciation for this American pastime and do I also hate apple pie? (Answer: I don’t hate it, but I don’t really like it either) I will remind you that I was raised in Maryland and my baseball team is the Orioles. ‘nuff said. Here’s Monday night’s TV:
8:00pm: “10 Things I Hate About You” on ABC Family
“24” on Fox. Back to back new episodes at a special time. Jack Bauer will take you behind a building and waterboard that case of the Mondays right out of you!
“Chuck” on NBC
“Dancing With the Stars” on ABC. I’d say I can’t wait for all these “stars” or “celebrity” based reality shows to run out of contestants, but then I remember that’s probably half of what keeps the other reality shows going. Two of the contestants on this cycle of “Dancing With the Stars” got their start on other reality shows. It’s a giant circle of suck, is kind of my point.
“The International Sexy Ladies Show” on G4. Yup. Still gonna mention it.
“Life Unexpected” on the CW
“Little People, Big World” on TLC. Sixth season spring premiere
“Top Gear: Guy Ritchie” on BBCA
8:30pm: “Little People, Big World” on TLC
“Rules of Engagement” on CBS
9:00pm: “NCAA Men’s Championship” on CBS. Special presentation. Butler Vs. Duke.
“Celebrity Fit Club” on VH1. 90 minute seventh season finale.
“Gossip Girl” on The CW
“Intervention” on A&E. Returning from hiatus, so half of Misery Night is back in swing.
“Trauma” on NBC
10:00pm: “Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations” on Travel. It’s listed as a “Techniques Special” so I guess it’s half clip show, half Mr.Bourdain wielding cooking implements as he deftly insults both himself and the viewer. Hot.
“Castle” on ABC
“Christian Siriano: Having a Moment” on Bravo. One hour special presentation.
“Damages” on FX
“Nurse Jackie” on Showtime
“Runaway Squad” on A&E. Series premiere. This looks like it could be heartbreaking, have the tissues ready if you plan to watch.
“Saving Grace” on TNT
10:30pm: “The Price of Beauty” on VH1. New episode at a special time. Uganda gets subjected to the attentions of Ms.Simpson this time.
“Runaway Squad” on A&E
“The United States of Tara” on Showtime
Late Night Listings
“The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” on NBC featuring Randy Jackson, and Matthew and Amy Roloff
“Jimmy Kimmel Live” on ABC featuring Kellan Lutz, Brooke Burke, and She & Him
“The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson” on CBS featuring Kristen Bell, Grant Imahara, and Geoff Peterson. (Pssssst! I’m pretty sure from following Twitter that Geoff Peterson is the robot skeleton that Grant Imahara made for Craig. Could be interesting.)
“Late Night with Jimmy Fallon” on NBC featuring Bob Costas, James Badge Dale, Jeff Musial, and Peter Wolf
“The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” on Comedy Central featuring Reza Aslan
“The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central featuring Dean Kamen
Intern Rusty is a Masters student at the University of Miami. You can learn more about her at Rusty’s Ventures.