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Woman Knows Her Target Market

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | April 25, 2010 |

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | April 25, 2010 |

I’m currently caught in one of those evil cycles where there is no winning. I took my last test in one class! So now I can devote more energy to that project due this week. I got the final reading done for that other class! Which means I have a little more time to practice for that opera I’m playing next week. Any accomplishment is swiftly negated by the fact that there is just so much else I need to get done that free time is something I have to schedule rather than something I can stumble across after a particularly proactive afternoon. Here’s a list of all the TV I won’t be watching tonight because I’ll be too busy working, playing my bass, cleaning up the disaster that is my room, or some combination of all three:

7:00pm: “60 Minutes” on CBS

“America’s Funniest Home Videos” on ABC

“Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom” on Animal Planet

“‘Til Death” on Fox

8:00pm: “The Amazing Race” on CBS

“Discovery Special: How the Universe Works: Big Bang” on Discovery. One hour special presentation.

“Food Network Challenge: High School Reunion Cakes” on Food Network. Is this a thing? I was always under the impression that your high school reunion was a lamer version of junior prom where everyone’s less comfortable with each other and the same crappy sheet cake and punch that you can buy in bulk from Costco was served. Am I wrong? Because if awesome cake is involved I may revise my future plans regarding high school reunions. Yes I do take cake that seriously.

“Minute to Win It” on NBC

“The Simpsons” on Fox

“Sunday Best” on BET

9:00pm: “The Apprentice” on NBC

“Brandy and Ray J: A Family Business” on VH1

“Desperate Housewives” on ABC

“Holmes on Homes” on HGTV

“Into the Universe with Stephen Hawking” on Discovery. One hour special presentation.

“Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane” on Style

“The Pacific” on HBO

“The Tudors” on Showtime. I’d been watching previous seasons on Netfix last summer until I broke up with the show after watching an actress with eyes so blue they were nearly clear portray the famously dark eyed Anne Boleyn. Seriously, is it that hard to find a British actress with brown eyes who’ll do topless? However, the lure of pretty costumes and absolutely absurd accounts of history have proved too much to resist and I get the first disc of season 3 in the mail tomorrow.

“2010 TV Land Awards” on TV Land. Special presentation. I thought TV Land showed nothing but re-runs, what do they give out awards for? Best actress in a Hover-Round ad?

“When Love is Not Enough: The Lois Wilson Story” on CBS. Original telefilm.

9:30pm: “American Dad” on Fox

“Gene Simmons Family Jewels” on A&E

10:00pm: “America the Story of Us” on History

“Army Wives” on Lifetime

“Basketball Wives” on VH1

“Breaking Bad” on AMC

“Hoarding: Buried Alive” on TLC

“Into the Universe with Stephen Hawking” on Discovery. One hour special presentation.

“Jerseylicious” on Style

“Kendra” on E!. I’m mentioning this especially for Comma, who may be the only person I know who has ever seen enough of this show to form an opinion of it.

“Kirstie Alley’s Big Life” on A&E

“Treme” on HBO

“Brothers and Sisters” on ABC

Intern Rusty is a Masters student at the University of Miami. You can learn more about her at Rusty’s Ventures.

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Genevieve Burgess is a Features Contributor for Pajiba. You can follow Genevieve Burgess on Twitter.