Hey all! Today’s an exciting day because by this evening we’ll know both teams headed to the Super Bowl and its my younger brother’s 21st birthday! Now, as my brother is a responsible and level-headed individual who has classes starting again tomorrow I’m sure he’ll be 100% sober by Wednesday at the latest. You should all wish him a happy birthday because then I can send a link to this article to him and it’ll be like I wasn’t too poor to get him a birthday present. And next time he comes down to Miami, first round’s on me! Unfortunately there’s not much happening on the TV tonight since both the championship games are being played out of prime time and it’s, you know, Sunday. Here’s what you can ignore via Netflix or reading tonight:
7:00 p.m.: “Dateline” on NBC.
8:00 p.m.: “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” on ABC. Two hour episode.
“Food Network Challenge: Beauty Pageant Cakes” on Food Network. Are they going to be made with the tears of little girls mixed with whatever drugs you have to take to think that putting a six year old in nothing but sequins and tulle with hooker make up and a blow out that’s bigger than the rest of her is a good idea? No? Just cake? Then I probably won’t be watching.
9:00 p.m.: “Ax Men” on History.
“Big Love” on HBO.
“Iron Chef America” on Food Network.
“Masterpiece!: Emma (part 1)” on PBS.
“AT&T US Figure Skating Championships” on NBC. Two hour special presentation. And I … might watch this. Because I have ovaries which means that I’m obviously a huge fan of ice skating, gymnastics, and other athletic activities which are branded as “girly” despite being hard as shit and intensely dangerous. But hey, there’s not a ball, so it can’t be a real sport, right? Right.
“The Tiniest Girl in the World” on TLC.
10:00 p.m.: “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” on E!.
“Twins: What You Never Knew” on TLC. This title makes me uneasy for some reason. Then again, most shows on TLC make me uneasy. It’s kind of their thing.
Intern Rusty is a Masters student at the University of Miami. You can learn more about her at Rusty’s Ventures.