film / tv / politics / social media / lists / web / celeb / pajiba love / misc / about / cbr
film / tv / politics / web / celeb


Genderswapped King Arthur Rebooted IRL

By Kristy Puchko | Miscellaneous | September 5, 2017 |

By Kristy Puchko | Miscellaneous | September 5, 2017 |

Cue the chorus, sound the trumpets. For a child has pulled a sword from a lake, and if Monty Python’s Holy Grail has taught me anything, it’s that the monarchy is based on people pulling weaponry from water. So, who cares about the upcoming royal baby? Clearly seven-year-old Matilda Jones is destined to rule the realms of the United Kingdom!

On holiday with her family in Cornwall, Matilda Jones was wading through a small lake called Dozmary Pool, when she spotted something glinting at its bottom. It was a sword, four-foot-long.

The Mirror reports, “According to local folklore, Dozmary Pool is the spot where King Arthur returned Excalibur after being fatally wounded in the Battle of Camlann.” Matilda’s father told this story to her as they visited the pool, recounting how the Lady of the Lake reached a hand out of the once seemingly bottomless water to receive it. So, when waist-deep in the pool, Matilda called out that she saw a sword in the water, he thought it was an overactive imagination. “I told her not to be silly and it was probably a bit of fencing,” Paul told the press. “But when I looked down I realized it was a sword. It was just there laying flat on the bottom of the lake.”

Paul insists the sword is not an ancient artifact, but probably a film prop. But Paul was wrong about the sword once already. Shockingly, The Mirror didn’t bother to get a quote from the UK’s new wielder of Excalibur. Nonetheless, Twitter is ready to embrace Matilda Jones as the one true ruler of the island nation.

Go to The Mirror link above for more pics of Matilda and her sword.

Morning Briefing: Once Again, Donald Trump Takes the Chickensh*t's Way Out | Sentient Sock Crust Piers Morgan Shut Down Over Gender Neutral Clothing Hysteria

Kristy Puchko is the managing editor of Pajiba. You can follow her on Twitter.